Skip to main content

Full text of "Wanderlust"

See other formats


1 A 


of ti)e 

Wini\ytv6itv of i?ortl) Carolina 

Collection of Moxti^ Caroliniana 

This book must not 
be taken from the 
Library building. 

m^^ I1IL£ HiAS 6££N MlCKOjiLMED 

Form No. 471 

•'With one Grand Plunge I Grabbed the Rail of the 
Baggage Car." 

( Wanderlust) 






835 Broadway, New York 

Copyright, 1913, 


Hon. O. max GARDNER 





Well I remember my first escapade, and as I sit 
here to-night writing these memoirs, most vividly 
do I recall some thrilling experiences which occurred 
in the pine fields and on the sand hills of Florida. I. 
was then about fourteen years old and had just re- 
turned to the preparatory college after a most enjoy- 
able vacation. While at home I began to love the 
open life and to long for the grassy sarannaks, the 
orange groves and the pine belts of the southland. 

I had been thinking of running away for some 
time, being of a roving disposition and adventurous 
spirit, which, at this particular time, was fostered by 
the reading of dime novels and tales of adventure. 

One bitterly cold night in January I sat by the fire 
and read of Jesse James and his desperate gang of 
outlaws until midnight. Eighteen months' confine- 
ment in college with the check rein taut was more 
than the embryo hero could possibly stand. 

The clock struck twelve as I closed my book, and, 
reaching over, I stirred up the fading embers. I sat 
there and thought of the desperadoes of whom I had 
been reading, how heroic it would be to fight them, 
to have so many exciting adventures and hair-breadth 



escapes. The embers were dead when I finally de- 
cided on my plan of action. Sitting down at the 
little writing table I wrote the following note : 

My Dear Mrs. : 

I have been thinking of running away for a long time. 
To-night I have made up my mind to do so. I leave for 
Charleston this morning on the two fifteen train. Please 
send my trunk home. 

Yours very respectfully. 


I folded the note, addressed it, and left it lying 
on the table ; then I arose, opened the door, and stole 
silently along the hallway and down the stairs out 
into the darkness and cold. My shoes I carried in 
my hand, but before stepping off the porch I sat 
down and laced them on again. It was two miles 
and a half to the nearest railroad. I hastened along 
the deserted highway and reached the station, just in 
time to purchase my ticket and board the train. 

Two days later I stood on the wharf of the Clyde 
Line Steamship Company at Charleston, S. C, think- 
ing of home, and the dear ones I had left behind. 
There I was, three hundred miles away from friends 
and acquaintances, and not one cent with which to 
purchase my next meal. The day before I had ar- 
rived at Charleston with just ten cents in my pocket, 
and a dollar Ingersoll watch. I had not been there 
more than two hours before I succeeded in selling 
my watch to a negro. It was my first watch, too, 
and boylike, I had been inordinately proud of it, but 
the adventurer must be fed and lodged, and so the 
valued timepiece was sacrificed. 



Candidly, I longed to be back in college, for, no 
outlaw appearing in my immediate neighborhood, it 
seemed as though I had reached the end of my 
tether. After standing there on the wharf for some 
time, worrying over the situation and gazing over 
the blue waters of the Atlantic, new courage seized 


I boarded a ship which was anchored by, and m- 
quired for the second officer. Being told that I 
would find him on the upper deck, I proceeded 
thither and found the said individual giving orders 
to a greasy squad of sailors. Stepping up to him, 
I inquired if he would allow me to work my way 
to Jacksonville, Florida. He asked me if I had ever 
been to sea, and I replied in the affirmative. 

"Well," said he, "be aboard by five o'clock this 
afternoon, and I will put you to work cleaning 

We sailed at the set time, and in the afternoon 
of the seco?id day out, while polishing brass on the 
railing of the upper deck, a man approached me 
and introduced himself as Captain Hastings. ^ After 
a short conversation, he told me that he was in need 
of a young man on his farm, which was in Florida, 
and he concluded by asking if I would take a posi- 
tion with him. I asked him what kind of work I 
would have to do, what salary he would pay and 
where his farm was located. He replied that he 
would want me to carry the mail on horseback Mon- 
days, Wednesdays and Saturdays from the^ railroad 
station to his farm, a distance of thirty miles. He 
further added, that his farm was one hundred and 
fifty miles below Jacksonville, on Haw Creek, a 



branch of the St. John's River, and that he would 
furnish a horse and give me twenty dollars a month. 
I jumped at the chance. 

While talking with this gentleman the second 
officer came along and instructed me to go below 
and assist in washing dishes. I was glad to do this, 
for it was very windy on deck and I had already 
contracted a cold. The waiters on board the ship 
were negroes, one of whom I shall remember always 
for the little disagreeable encounter that took place 
between us. Southern born, I had been taught to 
make a negro respect me, and even in my menial 
position I could not suffer myself to be bulldozed. 
Every time he came in the dish-closet to empty his 
tray in the sink he would make some insulting re- 
mark, sneer and brush rudely against me. 

I realized my position. Knowing that the odds 
were against me, I held my temper to the very last 
moment. I told him to mind his own business or 
else there would be trouble. At this remark, he 
slapped me in the face and said, "Don't talk to me, 
you poor white trash." 

I did not attempt revenge at that moment, al- 
though the blood in my veins was running hot with 
anger, but waited for a suitable opportunity, and 
it was not long in coming. A few moments later, 
as he was walking through a curtained door, carry- 
ing a tray heavily laden with dishes, I turned and 
caught him squarely on the cheek with a big coffee 
cup, which caused him to drop dishes and all as he 
fell to the floor bleeding. This blow rendered him 
unconscious, and that part of the ship was put in 



I thought the other negroes would mob me before 
I could make my escape, but, jumping through an 
open window, I gained the deck and ascended to 
the officers' quarters, where I presented myself to the 
captain, asking for protection and telling him what 
had occurred. He listened kindly, and taking pity 
on me, a boy of fourteen, he promised me protection 
until we arrived in Jacksonville. 

This affair was the talk of the ship until we ar- 
rived in port, and just as we were anchoring I was 
told by the second officer that the negro intended 
having me arrested by the city officials. Becoming 
aware of this, I informed Captain Hastings, and he 
volunteered to see me safely ashore, and also to 
place me on board the "City of Jacksonville," a 
small steamer which was to carry us to Crescent 
City, a distance of one hundred and twenty-five 
miles from Jacksonville, and fifteen miles from his 

We left Jacksonville in the morning and arrived 
at Crescent City about six o'clock the same evening, 
where we spent the night. That day, as we were 
steaming up the St. John's River, I became hungry 
between meals, as boys generally do, so I went to 
the chef and traded a little imitation diamond ring 
for a couple of ham sandwiches. 

I had not written home since my departure, con- 
sequently, that night at Crescent City I indulged in 
a second commercial adventure. I traded a gold 
v/atch chain for a two cent stamp, paper, and en- 
velope and informed my people of my whereabouts 
and of my future intentions. 

We put up, so to speak, at one of the small hotels 



of the town, for the night, and I bunked in a room 
with two men who were accompanying Captain 
Hastings to his turpentine farm, where they were 
going to serve as overseers. This was their second 
winter on his farm, and before going to sleep that 
night they told me many stories of the big plantation, 
its hundreds of negroes, horses, cattle, turpentine 
stills, and alligators. They took special delight in 
reciting the brutal murders committed by the out- 
laws, who at that time were roaming throughout the 
section. All of this did not frighten me, however, 
nerved as I was by home-sickness, and the fear of 
finding myself unromantically lodged in jail. 

At Crescent City the next morning, Captain Hast- 
ings* private launch met us, and we moved down 
Haw Creek to his place, arriving about noon. The 
same afternoon I made arrangements for board with 
Jim Hughes (a young married man), who had lived 
on the place several years and who was head stable 

Monday morning I mounted the pony which was 
given me, and was off for the station. I reached 
the station late that afternoon, making slow time 
because the roads were very bad and swampy, and 
by sunrise the next morning I was five miles on 
my way back to the farm with saddle bags full of 
mail and packages. 

The pony was a sturdy little rascal with shaggy 
mane and tail. His name was Billy, and the more 
I rode him the more I liked to have him carry me 
swiftly to and from the mail station. Whenever I 
went into his stall to feed him he would always put 


\\^ A N D E R L U S T 

his shaggy head over my shoulders and whinny as 
if to say, "I'm ready for it." 

I stayed around the ranch a few weeks until I 
tired of the monotony of those daily rides, and 
even Billy could not hold me. So one morning I 
gathered my few belongings together, tied them up 
in a little brown sweater, bade all goodby and pro- 
ceeded on foot to Barbersville. I took to the road 
early in the morning, that I might have ample time 
to make the distance in two days. 

The road was a sandy one, leading through deso- 
late, lonely woods, the same road over which the 
little pony had borne me many a time. It was diffi- 
cult walking, for there were many swamps and miles 
of sand roads. I plodded silently and slowly on my 
way, arriving at the half way camp about dusk. 
This was a lumber camp, established temporarily, 
and I knew some of the boys, as I had been accus- 
tomed to pass there on my way to the post office. 
Often I used to make small purchases in Barbers- 
ville for the boys at this camp, and they were glad 
to shelter me over night. 

We sat around the fireside, relating stories. By 
sunrise the next morning I was on my way, and at 
four o'clock that afternoon I strolled into town. I 
walked down the railroad track to where an empty 
box car was standing, and after gaining an entrance 
I proceeded to change my socks and trousers, for 
I had braved more than one stream between the 
camp and the station. 

Folding my wet garments in the brown sweater, I 
strapped it on my shoulders, and walked down the 



railroad track, a hike towards Sanford. Nightfall 
came shortly, and I became hungry. 

Through the dusk I sighted a small house, so I 
left the track and struck out across the marshy 
lands, towards it. After crawling under several 
wire fences and beating off a dog with my stick, I 
finally arrived at the door. I rapped, and at my call 
there appeared an old lady. I informed her of my 
predicament, and she went to the cupboard and 
brought forth a big chunk of meat and a piece of 
bread, which was eagerly accepted, I can assure you. 
I thanked her kindly, and turned back to the rail- 

By this time it had grown dark, and I was unable 
to find my way. I walked for at least half an hour, 
and then realized that I was lost. I stopped and 
took in the situation. The light I could no longer 
sight. There I was, lost in the swamps of Florida. 
What was I to do? To my right I sighted through 
the darkness an object which looked like a mound 
of some description. On investigating it proved to 
be a haystack. This, indeed, afforded a great 
treat, for in the side of it I burrowed a hole where 
I buried myself for the night. Being tired and sore 
from my two days' journey, I did not move from 
my comfortable nest until fully three hours after 

I yawned, stretched my rested limbs, rubbed my 
eyes, and crawled out of my warm, cozy nest into 
the sunlight. Strapping on the sweater, with its 
contents, I struck across the field for the railroad, 
and hit a slow pace over the cross-ties down the 



Boys are always hungry, and justly so when they 
they haven't had breakfast. Sighting a little cottage 
which sat back only a few rods from the railroad, 
I strolled up to the back door and rapped. A lady 
opened it to me, and when I told my tale, she invited 
me into the kitchen, where I sat down at a table, 
and relished a nice breakfast. Goodness ! but it did 
taste good. As I sat there devouring my food, she 
asked me many questions concerning myself. This 
put me in a serious mood, and when she began talk- 
ing about home and those I had left behind, a great 
lump formed in my throat, and a big cruel tear 
rolled down my cheek. I did not wish to let her 
know she had touched a tender cord, so I said, 
''There is something in my eye," at the same time 
rubbmg it and drying the tears with my handker- 
chief. She was a good woman, and those soft, ten- 
der words would have brought tears to the eyes of a 
hardened criminal, much less a very youthful mod- 
ern soldier of fortune. 

She became interested in me, and related the sad 
story of her son. Only a few months previous, he 
had run away from home and had been killed while 
riding on a freight train in Georgia. She pointed 
out to me his lonely grave, which was at the edge of 
a little clump of pines, just across the field. My 
heart went out to her in warm-felt sympathy, and 
bowing my head, I uncovered and went out into the 
lonely world, thinking of that poor heart-stricken 

About noon I walked into a typical swamp town, 
the one room station being the principal building, 
and drew myself up on a pile of cross ties, just 



across the track. There I sat in deep meditation. 
Two or three little children who were playing in the 
station yard came over and stood looking and jeer- 
ing at me. They ran, however, when I muttered 
several mild threats, and made as though I was go- 
ing to pursue them. It was not long before I heard 
the whistle of a locomotive in the still distance. 

Presently, the big engine, with its train of pas- 
senger cars, pulled into the station and drew up at 
the water tank. When it stopped, I descended from 
my perch and walked down the track. I was afraid 
to board the blind baggage, the space between the 
mail coach and the coal car, for a number of the 
train crew were standing around. When the tank 
had been filled and the engine began to draw away, 
my heart sank within me, for I thought I had lost 
an opportunity to ride. 

As the big engine pufifed by, the engineer saw me, 
a poor little kid away out in the wilderness, standing 
by the track, and he motioned me to jump aboard. I 
ran, caught the rod on the side of the mail coach, 
and swung myself into a seat on the platform, right 
behind the coal car. 

It was one hundred miles to Sanford, so the mile 
posts read, and I was determined to stay aboard. I 
unbuckled the sweater from my shoulder and threw 
it up on the coal. Around my neck I wore a big 
blue kerchief and on approaching a station, I would 
turn my black felt hat up in the front, perch myself 
on the coal car in full view, there escaping the obser- 
vation of any one, for officers at every station would 
pass me by believing me to be one of the train crew. 

About five o'clock that afternoon, the big locomo- 



live drew us safely into Sanford. Before pulling 
fairly into the station I yelled good-by to the engi- 
neer and swung lightly to the ground. He looked 
back and I waved again. 

Realizing that town folks are not wont to help 
one in search of food and shelter, I began my march 
towards the outskirts and into the country. At 
a farmhouse about two miles out, just as dusk was 
clothing the world in darkness, I secured shelter for 
the night. I told the man of the place I was in 
search of work, so he took me in, with the provision 
that I should do a few odd jobs the next morning. 
With a hot steaming supper under my belt, I sought 
my bed and was soon wrapped in slumber. 

I did about two hours' work the next morning and 
then walked back to Sanford, where I secured a 
place as help boy on one of the fishing boats. We 
stayed out on the first trip three days, and I was 
so desperately sea-sick all the time I was of little help 
to them. The master of the boat was a good old 
fellow and he paid me for my three days just the 
same, one dollar and fifty cents, half a dollar a day. 
With this fortune in my jeans, I felt very prosperous, 
and strolled down the main street, where I bought 
half a pound of mixed candies for five cents. As 
I walked casually along the main street chewing the 
sweets, a pair of tan shoes for one dollar and twenty- 
five cents caught my eye. These I purchased and 
went triumphantly squeaking out into the street. 

It was difficult to catch a freight or passenger train 
out of Sanford as all trains were closely watched, so 
I decided to foot it to the first station where south- 
bound trains stopped for signals and orders. This I 



understood was about ten miles. I struck up a lively 
pace down the track, through the work yards, out of 
the city limits and into the open country. 

The big heavy tan shoes I had recently purchased 
felt comfortable and evidently were made for walk- 
ing cross-ties, for the cinders in the track could not 
cut through the heavy soles. I made good time on 
this piece of road-bed, for the ties were just about 
the right distance apart to fit my steps. Along the 
railroad there were numberless orange groves with 
loads of large luscious oranges, and occasionally I 
refreshed myself. Finally, I came to a big orange 
grove. A number of the limbs were hanging so near 
the track, one passing on a train could almost have 
plucked an orange from the coach window. 

I filled my pockets with fruit, and noticing a little 
pond a few steps from the track, I went over and 
sat down by its border, on a springboard, one end of 
which was made fast to the bank. There I sat and 
ate oranges to my heart's content, and never did 
•stolen fruit taste sweeter. The sun was now almost 
perpendicular, and its golden rays beating profusely 
down on my top knot, put me in the notion of taking 
a swim. 

Taking ofT my clothes, I plunged from the end of 
the spring-board and paddled around in the lucid and 
refreshing water. The bottom of the lake was sandy 
and cool, and it felt awfully good to my feet, espe- 
cially after a walk over cross-ties in those new tan 
shoes. I paddled around the water enjoying every 
moment to myself till I saw several little alligators 
around me, then I made a bee-line for the land. Just 
as I was nearing the bank a big ugly looking alligator 



"Gee \\m/; He was bij^: Fimuo^h to Swalk'w me Whole.' 
C Wfinrfrrlust ) 


bobbed his head up out of the water directly in front 
of me cutting off escape. For a moment I was so 
stunned with fear I could not move. There was that 
big ugly mouth with its even row of sharp white 
teeth. Gee whiz! he was big enough to swallow me 
whole, but he was not going to get a chance if I 
could help myself. Realizing my danger, I stood 
perfectly still and didn't move a muscle. I couldn't. 
My heart seemed to stop beating. Without my 
mind's command my body plunged forward, and be- 
fore I knew it I was standing on the bank, shivering 
with fright. 

The alligator wiggled over to the other side of 
the bank and lay in the sun while I made ready to 
put on my garments. This indeed did not consume 
much time, for my costuming was scant. As I was 
about to depart from the field of my recent adven- 
ture, a native black informed me that I was intruding 
on private grounds and I must "git out." 

Emerging from the tall tropical bushes which were 
on either side of the railroad track, I saw a man 
standing there, and I was not long in learning that 
he was the owner of the grounds on which I had 
been intruding, and when I told him of my adventure 
with the alligator in the pond, he laughed heartily. 
In reciting my story to him he interrupted me by 
asking if I had thought of Jonah and the whale when 
that big pet alligator of his was staring me in the 
face. Well, not on your life ! 

I learned that the station was only a ten minute 
walk, and I made a bee-line for it. I soon arrived, 
and behind some box cars I sat down to await the 
train, but, hungry again, I stole over to a small 



house nearby and secured a snack from the good 
housewife. With the food wrapped in a piece of 
newspaper, I returned to my seat behind the car, par- 
took of my noontime meal, finishing off with mixed 

The first train that came along was a local freight. 
I hid myself between the two front box-cars, but 
before the train drew out I was discovered by the 
conductor, who made me leave my perch on the 
couplers. He inquired where I was bound for, and 
I promptly told him I lived in Orlando and was try- 
ing to make my way home. I asked him to allow me 
to work my way and to this he consented. The 
freight was soon off and I was on my way once more. 
At stations I helped the train crew to load and un- 
load the freight. 

About five o'clock that afternoon we reached Or- 
lando, where I spent the night in an empty box-car. 
Kissimmee, a distance of thirty miles, was the next 
town of any size on the line to Tampa, so I decided 
to walk the entire distance. 

Thirty miles when accurately measured is no short 
walk, and especially so when over cross-ties and cin- 
ders. Well, it was a long, long walk, and before I 
reached Kissimmee that evening I was both hungry 
and tired. Thirty miles ! It seemed like sixty ! 
Along the route I met several tramps, but did not 
stop to talk with them. At a house I asked for food, 
but was refused, the woman telling me that half a 
dozen of my kind had been there that very day with 
the same request. On insisting, she sicked the dog 
after me, and I lost no time in clearing out. After 
covering about twenty-five miles of the journey my 



shoes began to hurt and blister my feet so badly I 
had to take them off and finish the journey in bare 
feet. Here another trouble arose, for the sharp cin- 
ders cut me. This was slow walking, but it was a 
great deal better than walking in new shoes. 

At dusk I limped slowly into Kissimmee with the 
new tans swinging idly on my arm. I truly felt tired 
and footsore. I was so hungry I could scarcely pull 
my weary limbs along the highway. Arriving at the 
station, I left the track and made my way to the 
main street. I walked casually into a sixth rate res- 
taurant, and after some bargaining with the proprie- 
tress, an old maid from the swamps, I succeeded in 
inducing her to give me supper in exchange for the 
shoes I carried under my arm. 

"The regular price of a meal here is twenty-five 
cents," she informed me, and at least she reckoned 
she would let me eat, provided I would bring around 
the quarter the next day and redeem the shoes. I 
handed her the shoes and then seated myself at the 

I ate a hearty meal of wholesome food, and before 
I finished I think the old maid regretted her ex- 
change. When finished, I strolled over by the little 
stove in the dining room and sat down. An old fel- 
low sat just opposite me, and I was just about to 
ask him if he would know me in the future, when 
he broke the silence by inquiring, "Where are you 
from, sonny?" 

"Why, I am from North Carolina," I replied. 

"Well, what you a doing away off from home down 
here in this country?" 

"Just out for my health," I rejoined. 



''You must be taking a natural cure. I see you 
ain't wearin' no shoes," he blurted, laughing heartily 
at what he thought a great joke. 

To this remark I made no answer, and he again 
broke the silence by asking several questions; as to 
whether or not I smoked, chewed, drank or had any 
bad habits. I told him I did not smoke, drink, chew, 
nor stay out late at nights, and as for my bad habits 
that was for others to judge. The old fellow seemed 
to be rather interested, and before our conversation 
ended he offered me a job out on his sheep ranch, 
five dollars a month and board. 

Considering his proposition a few moments, I ac- 
cepted, calculating that the experience itself would 
be well worth my while. That night he redeemed 
my shoes. The following afternoon we drove out to 
his ranch, some fifteen miles from town. He lived 
in a big log house and, all in all, he was very com- 
fortably fitted up. 

My employer, Mr. Heines, conducted a general 
feed and sale stable in Kissimme, so the next day he 
returned to town leaving me there with the members 
of his family to help around the house, doing odd 
jobs, such as cutting wood, feeding the pigs and 
cleaning up the barnyard. 

Mr. Heines had an unfortunate brother who was 
a lunatic, and I had to sleep in the same room with 
him. This did not suit my fancy very much, so about 
the fifth day I told Mrs. Heines I wanted to leave. 
I stayed, however, till the following Monday morn- 
ing and went back with Mr. Heines, who had come 
out to spend Sunday with his family. 

The week before, "the boss" had received a carload 



of Texas mules, and for the next few days after 
my return to town I was engaged in breaking them 
under saddle. Before I left, I was declared one of 
the best riders in town. 

During my stay in Kissimme I made the acquaint- 
ance of a young fellow by the name of Ed James, an 
engineer on one of the trade boats which plied over 
Lake Kissimme, where its captain traded with the 
Seminole Indians. Ed told me that if I wished he 
Avould get me a place as cabin boy on his boat and 
that I could make the next trip around the lake with 
them. This offer I accepted willingly, and a few 
days later found us steaming around the lake heavily 
laden with goods of all kinds which Captain Hall 
traded to the Seminoles for furs, dried fish, shells, 
and hides, as well as baskets and other little things 
made by the Indians who inhabit the swamp lands of 

On this trip I served as cabin boy, and it was a 
most enjoyable two weeks' outing. 

After my return from the cruise on the lake, I 
spent a few days loitering around the town, and then 
made my way to Tampa. At Tampa I worked sev- 
eral weeks on a fruit boat which ran between Tampa 
and Key West. 

To make a long story short, I visited Miami, Talla- 
hassee and Pensacola, finally arriving back at Tampa 
some weeks later. From Tampa I journeyed 
to Sanford via freight train de luxe, and at that place 
I succeeded in boarding a blind baggage on a pas- 
senger bound for Jacksonville. At Sanford I was 
standing by the track about a quarter of a mile from 
the station, when I saw the train slowly approaching, 



but before it reached me it had increased to such 
speed that I was almost afraid I could not swing 
aboard. However, I determined to take my chance. 

As the engine came steaming by I caught the han- 
dle rod of the first coach and swung myself into a 
position just behind the coal car, and there I rode, 
standing upright. The engineer and fireman both 
knew I was on, for the engineer had seen me as I 
swung into position. Part of the time I rode sitting 
up on the back of the coal car, and part of the time 
I rode behind the coal car, standing up and holding 
myself steady with the iron rod which ran along 
behind the rim of the car. 

We stopped at a little station called Warner, and 
as we drew up to get water, I suddenly remembered 
that an old friend of mine, Mr. White, a lawyer 
whom I had met at a summer resort several seasons 
before, lived there. By the side of the track I saw 
a couple of negroes sitting on a pile of cross-ties, and 
of them I inquired about my friend. They told me 
they knew Mr. White and that he lived in a house 
not far distant, at the same time pointing out a big 
residence. Quickly I drew from my pocket a letter 
which was addressed to me, and after taking the let- 
ter out of the envelope, I handed the latter to the 
negro and asked him to give it to my friend, request- 
ing him to tell Mr. White that I, the person whose 
name was written on the envelope, had passed 
through that afternoon. He promised me faithfully 
that he would, and I afterwards learned that he 

The sun was sinking behind the pine fields and 
dusk was slowly clothing the earth in its folds as 



we rode into Palatka. The train pulled in, and as 
fate would have it, the engine drew up only a few 
yards beyond the depot. As we passed slowly by, 
I saw a policeman on the platform of the 
station and, quick as a flash, I jumped from where 
I was standing on the rear of the coal car to the 
platform of the baggage coach, and crouched, to pre- 
vent his seeing me as the train passed. I hid myself 
on the very bottom step of the car, opposite where 
he was standing, but evidently he saw me jump from 
my perch, or else he saw the top of my head as we 
passed, for we had no sooner come to a standstill, 
when, peeping from my position, I saw him coming 
around in front of the engine. 

I was determined not to be caught after havmg 
ridden so many miles in safety, so I left the steps 
quicklv, walked to the engine, and drawing my hand- 
kerchief from my pocket, I began rubbing vigorously 
the brass rods and pipes on the side of the locomo- 
tive. When the officer stepped around the engine 
to where I was standing, he looked at me for a sec- 
ond and then asked me if I had seen a "bum" coming 
around that way. I told him that I had seen a fellow 
jump off the steps of the car only a second before 
and walk towards the rear of the train. Evidently he 
thought me one of the crew, the way I was working 
on that brass, for he beat it towards the rear of the 
coach in search of his man. 

Another moment's wait and we were again on our 
way. It was ten o'clock when we arrived at Jack- 
sonville, and before I left the coal car, the dear old 
engineer with whom I had ridden all day, called me 



to him and handed me a quarter, with which to buy 

I walked out of the big station into the streets and 
soon fell into a quarter restaurant, where I pur- 
chased supper and then began to hunt for a place to 
sleep. No one proved a good Samaritan, so I had to 
content myself with an empty box-car, but this was 
not as bad as one might imagine, for it was strewn 
with bits of hay, which I gathered up in a pile and 
made for myself a fairly comfortable bed. 

The next morning while walking down the main 
street of Jacksonville, wondering where my next 
meal was coming from, a gentleman stepped up to 
me and remarked, "Well, you look as though you 
might have slept in a hay barn, young man." 

At this I did not take offence, but smiled, telling 
him that I really had slept in the hay that night, and 
that I was now looking for a place to get something 
to eat. As luck would have it, he took me over to a 
fairly decent restaurant and bought me a steaming 
hot cup of coffee and breakfast. He sat there and 
chatted with me while I devoured my food, and when 
I had finished I thanked him most heartily for his 
kindness and bade him good-by. I hung around 
Jacksonville several days living on ''hand outs" and 
sleeping at nights in the empty box-car. 

I tried to catch a train out of there, but found 
them so closely watched that it was impossible, so I 
undertook another walk. 

It was twenty miles from Jacksonville to Way 
Cross, and one bright morning I set out on foot. 

By then the tans were well worn and the walk- 
ing easy. About noon time I met another of my 



apparent caliber and he happened to be eating beside 
the track when I arrived. He had a fire kindled and 
was preparing his meal in a tin can. I sat down and 
soon we were partaking of hot coffee and cold bis- 

He had a letter in his pocket which he had written 
to his people in Connecticut and I gave him postage. 
He asked me where I was headed for, and I told 
him I was on my way home, and when I got there 
I was going to stay, for I was damn tired of tramp- 
ing around. 

When he heard me through he said, "Do you know 
what your folks will say when you get there?" 

"No. What will they say when I get there and 
tell them I have come home to die ?" 

"Well," he said, they will say, *You lie, boy ; you 
have come home to eat.' " 

That night about dark I reached the little town 
of Way Cross. A few negro huts, a post office, a 
general store, and one fairly decent house, which 
stood just across the track from the depot. At this 
house I requested food and the lady gave me a splen- 
did lunch. I asked the station master if I might 
sleep in the waiting room that night, and he told me 
I could. I was tired from my long walk, so it was 
early in the evening when I sought my sleeping place. 
I lay down on the bench and snoozed soundly till 
daylight next morning. 

Feeling somewhat rested, I arose and went out 
on the platform. I walked around to the side of the 
station and there lay, close up to the house, three 
men who were formerly with a circus in lower Florida 
and were now making their way to their homes in 



Baltimore. Within a short time a freight arrived 
and drew up at the water tank. I arranged with 
the engineer to let me ride to Uleaf in consideration 
of my helping the fireman. 

At that time most of the roads in Florida used 
pine wood instead of coal, so I busied myself in 
helping the fireman. From Uleaf I rode an empty 
box car over to Fernadina. By the time I arrived at 
Fernadina I was getting mighty tired of tramping 
around and wanted to get home pretty badly. I had 
three cents when I arrived there and with this I pur- 
chased crackers and walked down on the pier where 
I gathered up some oysters in the shell and thus fared 

For some time I had been thinking of wiring home 
for money and that day I thoroughly made up my 
mind to do so. Strolling up the street I walked into 
the telegraph office and advised the young lady in 
charge that I wanted to send a telegram, charges 
C. O. D. She informed me that a telegram could not 
be sent without a deposit for she did not know me, 
and that the telegram might not be accepted at the 
other end and she would therefore have to pay for 
the message herself. I assured her that the message 
would be accepted, but could not convince her. 

Half the day I spent in trying to get work but at 
every attempt, I was discouraged. That afternoon I 
made twenty-five cents in a local newspaper office 
turning the big wheel while the editor of the local 
Bugle fed the press. This quarter was my salvation, 
and after finishing my work I sallied forth to the 
telegraph office and planked over my money. The 



young lady promptly dispatched a message for me 
which was worded as follows: 

Want to return home badly. Please wire money. 


Night soon came, and I sought a lumber yard down 
by the wharf. I crawled up in the lumber pile and 
made my bed for the night. I did not sleep much, 
for I was thinking of home, how good a nice warm 
bed would feel and how glad they would all be to 
see me after months of separation. 

The next morning I received twenty-five dollars 
and made ready to depart for home. I inquired of 
the ticket agent what my fare would be, and he told 
me "twenty-one dollars." This money looked too 
good to me to spend so foolishly, since traveling 
freight was so easy, I decided to hold the coin and 
ride cheaper. I caught a train out of there that morn- 
ing, and at ten o'clock that night I arrived safely in 
Jacksonville after a rough ride on the rods of a 
freight. I went down to the docks and found one of 
the Clyde line steamers loading for Charleston. 
While the negroes were busily engaged in loading 
the freight I hid myself in the bottom and there 
awaited its departure. My hiding place was between 
some big boxes, and I knew I would not be discov- 
ered till after the ship had left port, so, feeling com- 
fortably safe, I dropped off to sleep. When I awoke 
we were steaming northward. Just as I crawled 
from my hiding place one of the crew saw me and 
let forth an oath. He grabbed me by the nape of 
the neck and hauled me bodily up to the foreman 
who was standing nearby. I did not attempt to re- 



sist at all, for he was a great, big, ugly devil and I 
was not going to take any chances on being disfig- 
ured at that time. The mate could do nothing more 
than set me to work, so to work I bent, and it cer- 
tainly was over hard. From the time they caught 
me till we arrived in Charleston I worked "like a 
slave, scrubbing decks. 

Arriving in Charleston, that night I sought a lodg- 
ing house, and the next day, after making a thor- 
ough toilet and purchasing a few clean clothes, I 
bought a ticket for my home in the mountains of 
Western Carolina. Here endeth the first adventure, 
and I returned, wiser of course, and somewhat dis- 
appointed, truth to tell, in not having captured a ruf- 
fian. However, I was glad enough to have saved 
my skin. How uncomfortable to have passed the 
remainder of my days in the somewhat contracted 
belly of the alligator. 



A FEW years later I entered the academic depart- 
ment of the State University, and I can say without 
blushing that I worked faithfully that year both in 
my studies and in athletics. When the summer came 
and the vacation months set in, I returned home and 
began work on one of the dailies as a reporter, 
which position I held until college opened the fol- 
lowing fall. 

During my sophomore year I succeeded in making 
the Varsity football and track teams, and as a conse- 
quence I was pretty much the man by the end of the 
season. The same year I was elected athletic editor 
of the Tar Heel, the college weekly, which I held 
down fairly well, as I had had some previous train- 
ing in the newspaper field. 

Spring came, and in due time summer and vaca- 
tion days would follow, but before the spring had 
fairly set in I began to formulate plans for the sum- 
mer months. There are numerous ways by which a 
young man may spend a pleasant summer, but I 
think by far the most interesting and adventurous 
one is a trip across the Atlantic on a regular old cat- 
tle-boat. I decided to make the trip across with two 
college chums. Arriving at Newport News, Va., two 
days after we had finished our examinations, we 
were not long in completing our arrangements for a 
trip on the cattle boat. The cattle exporter agreed 


W A N D E R L -U S T 

to give us each one pound, English money, and a re- 
turn passage on one of the company's boats. This 
being satisfactory, we were instructed to be on board 
early the following morning, as the ship was 
due to sail by seven o'clock sharp. The night pre- 
vious to our sailing we slept very little, so anxious 
were we for the morrow. 

Awaking about four o'clock on the morning of 
our sailing, we immediately proceeded to don the 
rough and ready clothes for this occasion. By the 
time our dress was completed we looked like gradu- 
ated tramps or some other creatures of the same sort 
with the degree "Hell from Texas." Brownie with 
his blue bandanna. Dug with his old football jersey 
and corduroy trousers, and I with my boots and a 
sweater which had seen service for several years. 

My headgear was most becoming, an old brown 
felt hat from which all the brim had been torn with 
the exception of a small part in front which served 
as a protection for the eyes. Each and every one of 
us realized that we were booked for a "rough and 
ready, lookout for number one" trip. We gathered 
up suit cases and made our way rapidly to the dock 
where the ship was lying in readiness. Seven o'clock 
found us safely aboard. After walking around the 
deck several times in search of an officer, we found 
the second mate, who, for the asking, readily per- 
mitted us to store our suit cases in his cabin. Three 
hours later we were gliding along the Virginia coast 
bound due northward, and by twelve o'clock land 
could no longer be sighted. 

Our foreman, that is, the foreman of the cattle 
squad, Dave Smith, came on deck in the forenoon 



and informed us that we need not come below till 
four bells that afternoon, as the other fellows who 
were experienced cattlemen, would attend to the 
stalling and roping of the steers, a tough job At 
noon our dinner was issued, but having eaten an 
unusually good breakfast we "really didn't care for 
anything," especially since the food was not over 
appetizing. After having examined the food, we 
pitched it over the side of the boat, telling the second 
cook that our dinner was enjoyed immensely, — and 
so it was, I presume, by the fish. 

The Shenandoah was some three hundred and 
sixty feet in length by fifty in breadth. She had two 
decks, which were respectively the main deck and 
the cattle deck. The main deck was used for vari- 
ous purposes, the fore part being used as a promen- 
ade for the officers and passengers; the rear part 
was on this trip used as a sheep deck, while in the 
central part of the deck were the cabins. Directly 
underneath the main deck was the cattle deck. This 
is divided up into stalls, and in every stall there were 
four cattle. The stalls run along the side of the 
ship parallel to each other, and the intervening space 
is termed the alley way. This main alley was di- 
vided by more cattle stalls in the hatchways, conse- 
qnently making two alley ways. Underneath the 
cattle deck in the big holes was stored our cargo, 
which was principally hay and corn. This being a 
slow steamer, she made about twelve knots an hour, 
but during rous^h weather her speed was diminished 
by something like five knots. 

That afternoon all the cattlemen were ordered up 
to the steward's room, where we were each issued a 



blanket, tin cup, plate, knife, fork and spoon. This 
completed our kit. As for food, we were each issued 
two pounds of brown sugar and two pounds of mar- 
gerine; this was supposed to last one week. When 
eight bells sounded we three went below and 
there were put to work feeding cattle. First 
we rolled the bales of hay down the alleyway 
from one hatchway to another; then, after having 
cut the wires on the bales, we would shake it apart 
and scatter the hay along the edges of the stalls in 
the alley way. When the cattle had eaten about half 
of the hay we then began to "fork in," that is, to 
fork the hay out of the alley way into the troughs, 
and after this was properly done we swept clean the 
alleys. It was fearfully hot and stifling down there 
with the cattle ; even with nothing on our bodies 
except armless gymnasium jackets, it was beastly 
warm. It was not a great while before the ship 
began to roll and rock, and we soon began to feel 
a little touch of seasickness, which was brought 
on so early by the heat and dust in which we were 
compelled to work. Before the setting of the sun 
I was leaning over the rail of the ship, deathly sick, 
and humming in my mind the tune of "Home, Sweet 

All the cattlemen are supposed to sleep in the 
forecastle, situated in the rear end of the ship, on 
the cattle deck, just over, or, rather, to the left of 
the stern. This was a dark, damp, forbidding little 
room, with only a few small portholes to admit the 
light. It was fitted up with wooden bunks on either 
side, and in the centre of the room stood a greasy 
wooden table on which the cattlemen ate. Besides 



being dark, damp and ding)', it was in the very part 
of tlie ship where the rolHng was most perceptible, 
and if we had attempted to sleep there, we would, 
most assuredly, have had to tie ourselves in for fear 
of being rolled out of the bunks. 

There were seven other cattlemen on the boat, and 
they did not seem to mind at all where they bunked 
or ate. We had investigated the forecastle that 
afternoon and found that we could not endure it. 
So, when darkness came and we had completed our 
day's labor, we quietly rolled up in our blankets with 
the ship's main deck for a mattress and our coats 
for pillows. It was not the least trouble for us to 
sleep, for we had slept none the night before, and, 
besides, we were weary from toil and sick from the 

The following morning at a quarter to six I was 
aroused from my peaceful slumber by Mike, a great 
big, strapping young Irishman, who was beating on 
my boot soles with a wooden paddle and bidding us 
"Git up," as it was time to begin watering the caUle. 
I was no sooner on my feet when I knew that my 
seasickness was still with me, nor did I recover from 
it for several days to come. 

We usually finished watering the cattle about 
seven o'clock. The job of watering is the hardest 
and most tedious of all. Every head of stock has 
to be watered from a bucket, placed in the trough. 

Each bullock will drink on an average three or 
four buckets of water every morning, so carrying 
from one hundred to two hundred buckets of water 
from a spot some thirty or forty feet away is no 
snap. Brownie always fed the hay while Dug and 



I did the watering. In watering one often loses one's 
temper, for the cattle will sometimes upset the water 
and, in consequence, drench the tender; and when 
the water is being placed in the trough they will 
very often butt over the bucket. After w^atering, 
we were always wringing wet, and would have to 
wait for hours before we could get a chance to lie 
in the sun and dry our drenched clothes. 

When the watering was finished, the next thing 
was to get up, out of the ship, forty-eight bales of 
hay and fifty bags of shelled corn. 

Generally Dug and I stood below and lifted the 
hay up to the cattle deck, while the other fellows 
rolled the bales along the alley to the hatchways, 
where they were to be used. We had about the 
hardest job of all, for lifting two hundred and 
twenty-five pound bales of hay is not an easy job 
by any means. 

At eight o'clock breakfast was issued, which al- 
ways consisted of a stale loaf of bread for each 
man, a piece of salted horse meat, and a bitter drink 
substituting tea or coffee. 

We three fellows always ate on deck, or on a box 
in the alleyway when the weather was raw. For 
breakfast we were allowed half an hour, and as 
soon as that time was up we were set to work sweep- 
ing the alleyways and cleaning out the troughs. 

For the noon meal we had only one dish, which 
was "scouse," a mixture of meat and potatoes, thor- 
oughly boiled in water. This dish is a favorite one 
with seamen, but I never cultivated a taste for it. 
We were allowed a rest of three hours after the 
noon meal, and that particular time was looked 



forward to with pleasure, for, not being used to 
hard labor with such a small and unappetizing 
amount of food, a nap in the sun was, as might be 
expected, much appreciated and thoroughly enjoyed. 
At three o'clock we began salting the cattle, and 
oh! how I used to hate that, for I knew the salt 
would make the cattle drink more water the morn- 
ing following. After salting, we fed hay, forked in, 
and then swept out the alleyways. By the time we 
had this finished it was nearing the supper hour, and 
this meal was just as bad as the rest, everlasting 
bread and coffee. 

INIore hay was forked in after supper, and we 
usually completed our day's work about seven 
o'clock, making in all about ten hours slavish work. 
When this was finished we never spent any time 
loafing, but retired to our quarters, ready to sleep. 

For three days I remained deathly sick, taking 
neither food nor water, and yet I held up through 
it all, doing my share of the work. 

On the fourth day out I felt better, and ate a 
little, which strengthened me considerably. At one 
time 'during my fast I w^as actually so feeble that I 
almost weakened under the small bags of corn. Mike 
and his little clay pipe filled with "Sensation Tobac- 
co," used to keep everybody on the ship in bad hu- 
mor, for the odor of that pipe was enough to sicken 
any one. When I regained my appetite, I ate^every- 
thing- in sight. I did finally come to "scouse." 

Well, crossing the banks of Newfoundland, the 
weather became intensely cold, and had we not dis- 
covered the "donkey room," I hardly know what we 
would have done. The "donkey room," a little place 



situated directly over the engines from which all the 
good warm air comes. This hovel was about half 
filled with coal, and every spare moment we spent 
in this room drying our clothes and warming our 
shivering bodies. We were no sooner dry when 
the spray would again drench us to the skin, and only 
one night during the entire trip did we sleep in dry 
clothes; luckily we were not subject to colds. 

The fourth day out the weather began to change 
for the worse, and on the fifth day we witnessed a 
most fearful storm in which Branner and I came 
near losing our lives; had it not been for the life- 
lines we would have been lost. 

We were working on the main deck with some 
sheep. The wind was blowing a terrific gale, and 
the waves were angrily dashing some fifteen or 
twenty feet above the deck of the ship. It was pour- 
ing rain and lightning was playing fantastically on 
the black, treacherous looking clouds in the dis- 
tance. The ship was pitching in every direction, and 
we could only keep our positions by holding tightly to 
the life lines which were stretched across the deck. 
We had been working there about half an hour when 
the ship gave a tremendous lurch, followed by a most 
savage plunge into the water; a huge wave swept 
the deck, carrying off fifty-two sheep, pens and all, 
right out from under our feet, while we held fran- 
tically to the line. 

The sheep and pens were carried over with such 
force that the iron railings which surround the deck 
were mashed and torn to pieces ; part of it being car- 
ried into the sea with the sheep and the pens. The 



weather became so very bad that we were compelled 
to change our sleeping quarters. 

Nights thereafter we lowered ourselves through 
one of the hatches to the bottom of the ship by 
means of a rope, and there on the bales of hay we 
made our beds. 

We slept in the bottom of the ship for eight nights. 
Every morning at a quarter of four the night watch- 
man would open up the hatch and yell in a deep 
voice, "Hello, down there, quarter of four, time to 
water," and we would invariably reply with the ques- 
tion, "How is the weather to-day?" 

The answer would usually be, "Bad, the sky's still 

The bad weather continued for five days, raining 
all the time, the ship tossing from side to side. Af- 
ter we had fully cleared the banks the weather began 
to get better and three days before we landed it was 
again calm. During clear weather, on afternoons 
when work was finished we used to go up on deck, 
strip, and then turn the hose on one another. It was 
a trifle cold but after we had given ourselves a fric- 
tion bath with a rough towel, we felt like new beings 
and were ready for our beds of hay and a good 
night's rest, to be followed by another day's labor. 

Often we would amuse ourselves on deck by a 
wrestle or a round or two with some of the sailors, 
who thought themselves the best men on the ship. 
Three rounds in the ring with a husky sailor is posi- 
tively guaranteed to remedy any case of indigestion. 

There were some great characters on our boat be- 
sides Mike Johnson, the big Irish foreman. There 
was old man Dunn, "the locator." I believe 



he sometimes went by the name of Colonel Dunn, 
but he was generally known among the cow-punch- 
ers as the "Locator," for at every available opportun- 
ity he applied the word "Locate," generally humor- 
ously inappropriate. 

• Colonel Dunn was a man of sixty-seven years, 
born in Scotland, near Edinburgh. At the age of 
ten he ran away and joined a ship bound for Aus- 
tralia. On his arrival there he spent several 
months on a ranch some hundred miles in the bush. 
Soon tiring of this, he embarked for England where 
he enlisted in the English cavalry. He subsequently 
served in the French cavalry for three years and in 
Uncle Sam's cavalry for six years. He was in the 
West with General Custer, but just a few days be- 
fore Custer made his last stand Dunn v/as taken ill, 
consequently not participating in that historic fight. 
He had crossed the Atlantic over twenty times and 
had been around the world more than once; besides 
he had traveled in almost every land of the world. 

The winter before I met him, he had spent on a 
ranch in the range country of Montana, and the 
spring he passed trapping fur bearing animals in 
the wildest parts of the Rocky Mountains. Even in 
his old age he could, it was said, handle a rifle and 
pistol to, perfection and could sit a bronco as long as 
the next man. Such was the Honorable Colonel 

The three cattlemen were "Yorky Kid," "Cock- 
ney," and "Willie off the Yacht." "Yorky Kid" was 
a young fellow of twenty, born in New York and 
who took to beating trains at the early age of twelve. 
Before he was sixteen he had traveled in every state 



and territory of the Union; and while with us he 
was making his fousth voyage across the Atlantic. 
He was a fairly decent looking chap, big hearted and 

generous. , , i 

^'The Cockney" was, without a doubt, the most 
broken down piece of humanity I have ever seen. 
Born in England, he emigrated to the States m the 
early seventies, since then he had been m Baltimore, 
becrging, and, I presume, stealing whatever came in 
his way. He was a bony, puny, yellow complexioned 
fellow, with black piercing eyes and dark hair He 
was an inveterate cigarette smoker, besides being 
death on any kind of intoxicating drinks, from the 
raw alcohol down. 

"Willie off the Yacht" was a character worthy of 
study I knew by his speech and manners that he 
was not an ordinary individual. By close question- 
ing I found out something of his past, though he was 
extremely shy about referring to anything concern- 
ing the bvgone days. Born in a little inland town of 
Maryland, the son of a poor man, he prepared for 
college by push and perseverance. 

Believing that New York offered many opportuni- 
ties for a lawyer, he decided to practice there. With- 
in ten years he had a law practice which brought 
him annually a comfortable income. Seven years la- 
ter he drew from his bank a sum which represented 
the savings of years, and with this he began to play 
the wheel of chance. As fate would have it, he lost. 
Disappointed and heart sick, he drifted to the bad, 
and from bad to worse until he became nothing but 
a mere hobo with an alcoholic brain and parched 



On the thirteenth day out we sighted land on the 
Irish coast, and I can truthfully say it looked gnod 
to me and was a welcome sight to all aboard. As 
we traveled onward we could see the land more 
plainly until at last we were able to sight distinctly 
three mountains, in bold outline against the sky, the 
Calf, the Cow, and the Bull. 

We steamed along the Irish coast for several hun- 
dred miles and old castles dotted along the hilltops 
and sides overlooking the sea were refreshing sights. 
In the afternoon, about five o'clock, we unloaded our 
cattle three miles from Liverpool and by eleven we 
were docked. 

In Europe ! Goodness, it seemed like a dream to 
think that what we had always longed for had be- 
come a reality. At Liverpool we rested a few 
days, and *'stall fed" till we were in trim; then we 
put out to see what there was to be seen on the other 
side of the pond. 

It would be useless for me to attempt to describe 
everything of interest we saw for the sights have 
been described half a hundred times over by others. 
At any rate, there was very little we missed, for we 
were all very energetic, and if there was anything 
to see we certainly were not going to miss it. 

In short, we spent some months in Europe, prowl- 
ing around in England, Wales, Ireland, Scotland, 
Germany Russia, Austria, Italy, Switzerland, 
France, Belgium and Holland. We had the grand- 
est time of our fair young lives, and after the tramp 
we were ready to return to our native land. 

A few months later found me back in the States, 
penniless from my sojourn in Europe, eager to get 



home in contemplation of a hurried preparation for 
the University. The return trip was not so disagree- 
able in that there were no cattle to care for and an 
occasional bask in the sun on deck, with an abund- 
ance of literature in my bunk, the time was whiled 
away very pleasantly. The day after arriving in 
Newport News found me in Norfolk. 

I waited till night for the purpose of swinging 
the nine o'clock blind baggage. I loitered around the 
station in the afternoon, in the mean time finding 
out all I possibly could concerning the different 
trains^ that leave Norfolk. Along about half after 
eight it began to rain and by nine o'clock it was pour- 
ing. I was sitting on the inside of the station when 
the "train yeller" announced the departing train. 

The rain was coming down in torrents, and the 
night was a fearfully dark one, so I had no trouble 
whatever in getting on the blind baggage without 
being observed. 

I crawled up on the platform and lay flat, keeping 
as close to the baggage door as I could for the rain 
had already drenched me to the skin evf n in the few 
moments I had lain there waiting for the train to 
pull out. 

We were soon off and I lay on the platform, 
drenched to the skin. It was rather late, and then, 
too, on account of the inclemency of the weather! 
there were only a few people around the country 
stations so I felt secure in my position. 

About an hour after we had departed from Ports- 
mouth we steamed into the little town of Wilson, 
and there I would have been caught had I not been 
just a bit faster than that rural constable. 


W A N D E R L" U S T 

It had not rained at Wilson and there were a 

great many people gathered at the station. As the 
train pulled up to the station people were walking 
on either side of the track, up and down, and it was 
almost impossible for me to escape observance as the 
lamps from the station were shining brightly, thus 
bringing me in full view of the people loitering 

The train had hardly arrived when a young fellow 
and his girl came walking along and on seeing me he 
remarked, "Oh, look at the tramp.** I could have 
pounded him, but under the circumstances I thought 
it best for me to keep quiet and say nothing. This 
I did, but before I knew what had happened a police- 
man came up by the side of the train and made an 
attempt to nab me. I was too fast for the old boy ; 
just as he was aiming to lay hands on me, I scram- 
bled for the other side and jumped from the plat- 
form. I made a bee line down the dark track and 
plunged off into the bushes. He pursued, but all 
in vain for I was a little too fleet of foot for him. 
I lay there in the bushes for only a few minutes, and 
v/hen the train came by I swung the blind baggage 
and was again on my way. This time the engineer 
saw me swing aboard and at the next station I was 
ejected from my position by the flagman. The train 
was so closely watched I found it quite impossible 
to gain my seat again. I was put off, away out in 
the lonely woods and everything around was as dark 
as pitch. The only thing looming up in the darkness 
was a little station building which sat by the side of 
the track. 

After feeling my way around in the darkness for 



some time I finally found a flat car loaded with 
big sewer pipes, and into one of these I crawled, 
where I remained for the night. Shortly after I 
had taken up my abode in this peculiar sleeping quar- 
ter it began to rain furiously, but I was protected 
from the terrific downpour, happier in my tunnel 
than Jonah in his whale. I did not sleep much for 
my clothes had been drenched in the early part of 
the evening, and I was shivering from cold through- 
out the night. 

It was a broken rest, but when I emerged from my 
quarters the following morning, I must confess I 
did feel just a wee bit better. 

On examining the contents of my purse, I found 
that I was the possessor of exactly forty cents. Near- 
by was a small country store, and there I purchased 
breakfast, which consisted of apples and sweet cakes. 
This left me with the fabulous sum of thirty cents, 
so I began to figure out how I could manage to get 
home on that. I walked into the station and pur- 
chased a ticket to the next stop, a distance of seven 
miles. The express was due at ten forty so I had 
only a few moments to wait. When the train came 
to a standstill I entered the coach, took my seat, and 
sat there awaiting the conductor. 

I had purchased a ticket for only seven miles, but 
it was my intention to stay on just as long as the 
conductor did not notice it, so presently he came in, 
collected my ticket, and at the same time remarked, 
"I believe this ticket carries you to Roundville." I 
did not speak, but merely nodded a reply. The sta- 
tion master had evidently put him wise to my game, 
so I saw the jig was all up for me. When we reached 



the next station, the conductor looked in the coach 
and yelled, ''All out for Roundville." I immedi- 
ately arose from my seat and before the train had 
fairly stopped I jumped from the platform, on the 
side opposite the station, and ran along the track 
unobserved to the baggage car, where I boarded the 

There I rode for several miles and at the next stop 
I alighted. 

In this village I spent the day. I passed the time 
chopping wood for an old lady, who gave me food in 
recompense for my work. That night I caught the 
nine o'clock local. Everything went well until we 
struck a big grade going down the mountain side, 
and when descending at a rapid speed the fire box 
of the engine fell out, and I was almost literally cov- 
ered with coals from the engine as they were posi- 
tively sifted on me. 

As soon as the engineer discovered what had 
taken place he brought the big monster to a stand- 
still on the side of the slope. 

As fate would have it, it had been raining consid- 
erably that night, and there were great pools of wa- 
ter by the side of the track, so before the train came 
to a full stop I jumped from my position and rolled 
over by the side of the track in the cold water, for 
already my garments had begun to burn, and in two 
or three places the coals had eaten through the 
clothing and blistered the flesh, which was horribly 

This drenching in the w^ater soon put out the fire 
on my clothes, but I lay there to make certain. Vv^hen 
the train halted I was lying in the gully by the side 



of the last coach, so near that I could plainly hear the 
inquiries of the passengers as to the cause of the de- 
lay. There in the water I remained some five min- 
utes, and then I got up and stole quietly along the 
side of the coaches to the engine. The men were still 
working on the fire bin, so, to avoid discovery, I 
concealed myself in the bushes by the side of the 
track. We were there fully half an hour, and during 
that time I thought I would surely freeze, for my 
clothes were drenched, and there was no possible 
means to dry them. 

The engineer and the fireman soon adjusted the 
bin and it was not long before we were on our way. 
It was now about midnight and there was only the 
station master at each of the little stations, so I was 
not so likely to be discovered. I rode on quietly un- 
til the flagman came to give the engineer some or- 
ders, and he could not help seeing me, for I was 
stretched across the platform, over which he had to 
pass on his w^ay to the engine. 

He saw me when he opened the door of the bag- 
gage car. I raised up and as I did he told me that I 
would have to get off at the next stop. I assured 
him that I would, and at the next station, before 
the train had come to a standstill, and before he 
came out to see that I did get off, I jumped from 
the train and ran along by the side of the track in 
front of the engine. I ran down the track for about 
one hundred yards, and concealed myself in the 

I waited only a moment when the train rolled by. 
With one grand plunge I grabbed the rail of the bag- 
gage car and swung myself to position. The bag- 



gage clerk was standing in the door of the car and 
he saw me get on, so within a few moments the con- 
ductor came out and said that I would have to get 
off. He added that if I did not get off he would 
place me under arrest and turn me over to authori- 
ties at the next station. I told him that I would, 
but before we reached the next station I crawled up 
on the coal car and buried myself in the coal, out of 
' the view of anyone. I literally buried myself in the 
bin and dropped off to sleep, for I was so exhausted 
I could hardly hold open my eyes. How long I slept 
I knew not, but when I awoke I know that every- 
thing around was just as hard black as could be. 

On awaking, I felt a horrible sensation of not be- 
ing able to move, and I was not long in discovering 
that I had been buried deeper in coal, which had been 
emptied in on top of me from an elevated shoot at 
a station where we had stopped to take on coal and 

There must have been a pretty good coat of coal 
covering me for I scrambled and fought for some 
time before I was able to free myself from the un- 
comfortable position. 

We arrived at Danville at daybreak and as the 
engine pulled into the yards I dropped off and 
walked down the track where I found a water spigot 
and there I bathed face and hands. Half an hour 
I spent trying to get the coal dust out of the pores 
of my skin, eyes and ears. 

A river runs right through the railroad centre 
of the town, thus dividing the passenger and the 
freight yards. A hugely constructed bridge spans 
this stream, so I proceeded to the freight yards and 


'Whcri I Awoke 1 Knew tliat I'^vervlliin^ Aroiiiul was a 
Hard I'.laok." 

( W'dHflf rliist ) 


there I was successful in getting one of the local 
freight conductors to allow me to work my way to 
Greensboro, a town en route home. I was informed 
the train would not leave til? nine thirty. 

Two hours at my disposal, I decided to spend it as 
profitably and pleasantly as possible. Walking over 
to the bank of the river, where there were tied scores 
of little boats, I unfastened one and shortly was 
smoothly gliding down the river. When I had floated 
to the outskirts of the town, I pulled into the bank 
and hitched my boat, undressed and took a cool 
plunge. I dried myself on the underclothes and then 
threw them to the currents. Realizing it was too 
much of a job to paddle that boat back up the 
stream, I left it tied fast and hit up a lively pace for 
the freight yards. 

Before leaving Danville, I placed a note in one of 
the neighboring boats advising the owner of the 
whereabouts of the borrowed one. 




Before the following Spring term was half ended 
I began to plan my second trip to Europe. 

The work on the ship the second trip over was 
practically the same, but I had a number of experi- 
ences which were new to me. 

On this trip there were in all thirteen cattlemen 
on board, eight college fellows, the foreman and 
four hoboes. There was 'Trenchy," our foreman, 
an excitable man with an irritable temper, who did 
not know that men were not to be abused, but in some 
cases be coaxed. 

Another member of the bunch was "Smithy," a 
little clumsily built fellow, with red whiskers and 
cross eyes, who had driven eight horses to one of 
Sells Brothers' Circus wagons for a number of years, 
and who was in every respect a typical hobo. 

Then there was "Rates," a good sort of fellov/ 
he was, and at times I really felt sorry for him. He 
was the hardest worker in the lot and often did 
twice his share when the other fellov/s were sick. 
"Rates" had been a cowboy in Dakota for a number 
of years, and enlisting in the United States Army 
while there, he went to the Philippines as a cavalry- 
man, where he remained two years. With us, he 
was making his first trip across. From London I 
learned he went to Capetown, South Africa. 

The greatest character on board was old Cole. In 



all my life I have never seen a man his equal in 
many respects. Medium in size with brawny arms 
and an over-developed muscular neck, he reminded 
one of a huge beast, muscles superbly developed and 
mind untrained. Cole was some forty years of age, 
and a boaster from the word "Go." At the early 
age of ten he ran away from his parents in Norway, 
and secured passage on a sail boat bound for Odessa 
on the Black Sea. I think him one of the most in- 
teresting talkers, from a certain standpoint, I have 
ever conversed with. At times he would charm me 
for hours with his tales of adventure by sea and 
land. I became so intensely interested in this man 
that at night, when all had retired save the watch- 
man, I would sit with him on deck for hours and 
hear him spin his tales of the past. Cole had been 
around the world several times and had visited every 
continent on the globe. In the heart of India he 
had served as a lackey to a very rich man ; in Aus- 
tralia he herded sheep for two seasons ; in Japan he 
was hostler for an American planter; in South 
Africa he mined, and in South America, at Buenos 
Ayres, he worked in the shipyards. Thirty years of 
his life he had spent in travel. Whiskey and to- 
bacco he craved. 

Old man Miller was our night watchman. He 
was a good old fellow, who did his duty and never 
had much to say. A baker in Baltimore, he became 
tired of his occupation, and feeling need of a change, 
he had sought a cattle boat for recreation. 

The ninth day out a terrible mishap came near 
ending the life of one of our comrades. On this par- 
ticular afternoon it was raining and the sea was run- 



ning high. We were all seated in the engine room, 
hovering around the steam pipes, endeavoring to 
dry our clothes and warm our chilled bodies, when 
a shrill cry was faintly heard from the fore part of 
the boat. Thinking that perhaps trouble had befal- 
len some one, we rushed in the direction from which 
the cry seemed to have come. Arriving at the door 
of the "foc's'le," we peeped in, and there, lying on 
the floor prostrate and apparently dead, was Cole, 
with blood streaming from his mouth and nostrils. 
Over him stood a fearless and well developed young 
fellow, whose name was Max Goodman, with fist 
clenched and face badly bruised. When I saw the 
bloody sight I was dumbfounded, for I feared that 
Cole would never again see the light of day. 

Goodman was considered one of the best young 
college pugilists in the South, and I realized from 
experience the force of his blows. He was one of 
our star football players, and we had been on the 
'varsity eleven together. Half blinded as he was 
by passion, I took him by the arm, and led him to 
the engineer's stateroom, where matters were ex- 

It seems that Cole had attempted Goodman's life 
with a pitchfork. On finding that he was unable 
to protect himself against this deadly weapon, Good- 
man retreated to a corner, where he secured a bucket, 
which he threw at Cole's head, causing him to drop 
the fork. Goodman then seizing his opportunity, 
charged on Cole and hit him squarely between the 
eyes. From the effects of the blows, poor Cole was 
confined to the ship's infirmary with a broken jaw 
and a badly bruised face. 



Seventeen days after embarking from America we 
steamed into the mouth of the Thames, and never 
was there a happier bunch of American college boys 
together. When we stepped ashore that most beau- 
tiful Sunday afternoon we were no longer cattlemen, 
but young Americans in Europe to see, hear and 
learn all we possibly could. 

Landing at Alexander dock, about twenty miles 
below London proper, we made our way rapidly to 
the nearest station of the elevated railway which 
runs parallel with the Thames, and boarded the 
first train going to the Fenchurch Street Station. 
Engaging two four-wheelers, we were soon driven 
into the square of the great and lavishly furnished 
Hotel Cecil, where we registered. 

Hubert Collins, a university man who was on this 
trip, and I left London for Liverpool, where we 
went aboard the steamship "Oravia," which was to 
transport us to Lisbon, Portugal. 

W^e glided smoothly out of the harbor and on 
our way to Portugal, which we so much desired to 
see, and from which point we could easily make our 
way across the frontier and into old historic Spain, 
where Don Quixote made his daring raid upon the 

Before we had been an hour out of port we se- 
lected our bunks and were comfortably seated in our 
new quarters. The first day out we made the ac- 
quaintance of most of our fellow passengers, and 
indeed we found them surprisingly agreeable. 

Leaving Liverpool on a Thursday, we made our 
first stop at La Pallice, the seaport of La Rochelle, 
a town of about twenty thousand inhabitants. Ar- 



riving at eight-thirty in the morning, we boarded a 
car which conveyed us to La Rochelle, at which 
place we spent the entire day in sight-seeing. We 
made our lunch on good French wine and sweet 

We returned to our ship about six o'clock that 
afternoon, tired and footsore from our day's tramp 
over the city. 

That night our ship remained in port, and never 
shall I forget the Frenchman who mistook me for 
a sailor and oitered to tip me with fifty centimes 
for pointing out to him the engine room of the ship. 
The next m.orning we steamed away, and Monday 
we made our second stop at Coronna, Spain, where 
Sir John Moore and his English soldiers were de- 
feated by the Spanish troops. 

Thursday we were scheduled to anchor at the port 
of Lisbon. I sincerely hoped that nothing would hap- 
pen to delay us, for the novelty of the trip had worn 
away and we were anxious to get ashore again. 

At the last stop we took on board two hundred 
dirty, foul-smelling Spanish immigrants bound for 
South America, and they kept things hot with their 
hand-organs and bagpipes. They never tired of 
dancing, for they kept it up from morning till night. 

There were several beautiful Spanish girls on 
board, and they danced most gracefully. I hardly 
think any one can equal the grace of a Spanish 

We arrived in the picturesque natural harbor of 
Lisbon in the morning and were soon bidding fare- 
well to the many friends that we had made during 
our week's voyage. 



In Lisbon we set about to find a suitable hotel, 
and this we were not long in doing, for the Hotel 
Camoes had been recommended to us by the steward 
of the ''Oravia." Here we found everything to our 

On arriving at Lisbon I soon found a land far dif- 
ferent in customs from any of the other European 
countries, for everything at first sight appears purely 

I have traveled in many countries of Europe, but 
I must confess that none struck me with such sim- 
plicity of customs. 

Lisbon, like Rome, is built upon several hills, and 
on first sight one would fancy it a city void of life 
and pleasure, but upon investigation this opinion is 
quickly changed. The population of Lisbon is some 
forty thousand inhabitants. The streets are well 
kept, and the street car system is surprisingly good. 
While there, we saw many things of interest, among 
them being the King's palace and beautifully kept 
parks, city waterworks, said to be among the finest 
in the world ; Black Horse Square, the Cave of the 
Dead, magnificent churches, and massively hand- 
some government buildings. 

There we witnessed our first bull fight, on a Sun- 
day, and never shall I forget how scorchingly hot 
I became while occupying my one peseta (15 cents) 
seat. I later learned that there is a radical distinc- 
tion between the Portuguese and the Spanish bull 
fights, the latter being far more cruel. 

By good fortune we had the pleasure of seeing the 
King and Queen with their young son as they drove 
from the palace. 



Two days we spent on a visit to the town of Bre- 
men, which is but a short distance from Lisbon. 
There is constructed one of the finest of the world's 
cathedrals, in which rests the remains of Vasco Da 
Gama. We saw also the point from which he set 
out upon his voyage to discover a shorter route to 

In Portugal one feels the spirit of the South. The 
men are exceedingly small in stature, their hair black 
and their eyes quick in movement. The women, like 
many of the Oriental people, are beautiful in girl- 
hood and young womanhood, but the hot, scorching 
sun soon dries them into old and ugly women. Even 
the women of the peasant class are remarkably 
beautiful, with their dark, bewitching eyes, long 
black silky hair and trim figures. The peddling on 
the streets is done by women. They wear large ear- 
rings and big bracelets around ankles and wrists. 
Their dress is of the simplest, and they wear neither 
shoes nor hats. On their heads they carry large flat 
baskets, loaded with their wares, and on every street 
one can hear them crying their goods and wares to 
the passing public. 

The principal beasts of burden in Portugal are 
donkeys and oxen. Of course, horses and mules are 
used, but they are for the richer classes. The wagons 
are pulled by oxen, sometimes four and six in hand. 
One car line in Lisbon is operated alone by mules 
and oxen. Those cars operated by electricity are 
generally patronized by the better living class, while 
the cars operated by mules are patronized by the 
poorer class. 

The shaggy ill-kept donkeys present a comical 


W A'N D E R L U S T 

sight, with great big baskets securely tied on either 
side. The load often looks larger than the don- 
key. Once while tramping in Southern Portugal 
I saw a little donkey about the size of a mastiflf, 
plodding along with two cages of chickens on either 
side and a woman and her babe comfortably seated 
on the donkey's back en route to market. 

One thing peculiarly common in Portugal and for- 
eign to many other lands is the way in which the 
dairies are conducted. In the stores along the main 
thoroughfares milch cows are stalled, and when a 
customer arrives the proprietor simply milks the 
amount called for fresh from the cow. By this 
means the buyer is sure of the purity of the milk. 

Soon tiring of Portugal and its oddities, we se- 
cured tickets for Madrid, but before reaching there 
we had a rare experience. 

Leaving Lisbon about 9 :30 we arrived at a sta- 
tion, — Baylo, — where we should have changed cars. 
There the train remained some minutes and during 
the wait we purchased two bottles of wine and four 
loaves of bread. The train moved slowly off, so 
being hungry, we settled comfortably back into our 
seats and soon fell to. 

As we were preparing to take our afternoon 
smoke, the conductor came around to collect the 
tickets. On looking at ours he told us we were on 
the wrong train. By this time we were some twenty- 
five miles from Baylo. 

At the next station we were put off by the con- 
ductor, and from signs and words obtained from a 
Portuguese-English conversation book, we learned 
that we would have to remain in that forsaken spot 



till 1 1 130 that night. It was then three o'clock in 
the afternoon. On discovering the costly mistake, 
we both cursed our ill luck. The worst of it was, 
we only had between us three hundred rois, thirty 
cents in Uncle Sam's coin. 

Two days later found us in Madrid, tired, dusty 
and hungry. We soon found a suitable hotel and 
made ourselves comfortable. 

It would be utterly impossible for me to write 
of all the things of interest which we saw while in 
Madrid, the capital of Spain. The first day there 
we spent in resting, but after that we were on the 
go from morning till night, for we were out to see 
all there was to be seen. 

We visited the Royal Palace, which is said to be 
next in grandeur to the Czar's Winter Palace at St. 
Petersburg. This palace is superb in architecture 
and is magnificently furnished. The royal stables 
contain hundreds of beautiful horses of all descrip- 
tion and carriages of every style. The most inter- 
esting part of the palace is the Royal Armory, in 
which we saw the old but well preserved armor of 
Christopher Columbus and the war implements and 
armor of Charles V. In this armory the weapons of 
all the great Spanish warriors are preserved, always 
carefully guarded. 

The Art Gallery of Madrid is second to none. 
There are collected the masterpieces of the v/orld's 
greatest artists, not only of Spain, but of other coun- 

The arena for the bullfights is most handsomely 
constructed, and there we had the pleasure of wit- 
nessing our second bull fight. These fights are held 



every Sunday, and quite often on Wednesdays. At 
this particular fight there were killed three horses 
and several bulls. It was far more cruel than the 
fight we had witnessed at Lisbon. 

We made Madrid our headquarters while in Spain 
and took excursions out to Toledo, the Escurial, 
Bungos and Granada. These places proved of as 
much interest to us as did Madrid. 

In Madrid the main thoroughfares are kept sur- 
prisingly clean, while the back streets are filthy. 
Several nights we spent theatre-going and saw some 
of Spain's celebrities. 

In the day time, between the hours of eleven and 
four, the streets are practically deserted, for the sun 
is so hot that work is impossible. Later in the after- 
noons the boulevards and squares are crowded. 

The Spaniard, the most courteous of all men, is in- 
sanely fond of bull fights, cigarettes, coffee, wine 
and women. The drinking taverns are always 
crowded in the evening with customers, who sit and 
sip their strong black coffees and puff their cigar- 
ettes, while they chat of dancers and matadores. 

A thing most peculiar to Spain is the large amount 
of counterfeit money which is in circulation. When- 
ever one purchases any thing and tenders a coin in 
payment, the shopkeeper invariably tests the purity 
of the coin on a sounding slate. 

From Madrid we journeyed to San Sebastian, 
where we visited the King's summer palace, and saw 
his Majesty. We happened here on a Sunday, and 
we did not miss the opportunity of seeing another 

San Sebastian is the most fashionable watering- 



place in Spain and there all the nobles and wealthy 
people of Portugal and Spain spend the hot season. 
Here we spent several days in preparing for our 
journey on foot across the Pyrenees Mountains. I 
had always wanted to cross the Alps or Pyrenees on 
foot, so when the opportunity was presented, I surely 
was not going to let it go by. 

Securing heavy walking shoes, suitable clothing, 
heavy walking sticks, we boarded the train at San 
Sebastian and alighted at the foot of the hills, where 
the road starts its winding way across the rugged 
slopes. Our only arms consisted of a couple of dag- 
gers, which we purchased at Toledo and a thirty- 
eight Colt's revolver. 

These lofty mountains and rugged foothills are in- 
habited by a lawless and murderous set of treacher- 
ous Spaniards, who strike whenever they have an op- 
portunity. Not heeding wild stories, we set out 
upon a journey calculated to test to the utmost the 
metal of your companion and one's endurance. 

The first day carried us into the heart of the wil- 
derness, where on every side one could see nothing 
but lofty crags covered with large boulders and 
shaggy grass. 

We employed a guide for a day to conduct us 
safely to the beaten trail, and four days later we 
were safely settled in the little vilage of Blanto, on 
the frontier of France. 

Although we had put up with a great many hard- 
ships, we enjoyed our tramp, and we only wished 
our journey had occupied twenty days instead of 
five, for we felt better each succeeding day, tramping 
over the rocky pathways. Two nights were spent 


'Tiic First Day carried us into the Heart of the Wilder- 

rrss where on P2very Side one could see Nothing 

but Lofty Crass." 

( Wanderlust) 


on the ground under the shadow of the cork trees, 
while the other nights were spent in huts along the 

During the tramp our food consisted, principally, 
of bread, goat's milk and fruit. 

One night while sleeping out we were alarmed by 
the approach of some sort of big animal, which per- 
sisted on making our acquaintance. By firing the re- 
volver several times we succeeded in frightening it 
away, after which we went back to sleep, only to 
be awakened in the early morning by a Spanish goat 
herder, w^ho insisted that we had killed one of his 
dogs. The dead animal proved to be our visitor of 
the previous night. 

At Blanto we made preparation for our railway 
journey to Paris. 

August found us in the gay city of Paris, where 
we chanced to meet again two of our friends of the 
cattle boat, Roy Saunders and Philip McDuff. 

We arrived in Paris about seven o'clock in the 
morning. Engaging a four-wheeler we were driven 
to our hotel, which was situated about a block from 
the Champs Elysees, the most beautiful boulevard in 
that wonderful city. After enjoying a good break- 
fast we repaired to our room, where we discussed 
the situation, and, I regret to say, it proved a serious 

We found that our friends, McDufiF and Saunders, 
had spent all the money they had, with the excep- 
tion of a few francs. Hurbert Collins had about 
enough to carry him to New York, and I had some- 
thing like seventy-five francs (fifteen dollars). Three 



days later Collins left Paris for London, from which 
place he sailed for New York. 

We three other fellows remained in Paris, expect- 
ing money by every mail, but we had to content 
ourselves with mere expectations, for letters con- 
taining the money never came. We soon realized 
that our situation was becoming a desperate one, 
and that we must do something, for our little supply 
of funds was diminishing daily. 

Finally we decided on advertising in the Paris 
edition of the New York Herald^ thinking that per- 
haps this would bring us an opportunity for some 
sort of work. Our advertisement read: 

Three young Americans, university education, desire po- 
sition doing anything. Address X Y Z, New York Herald. 

We paid for the insertion of our advertisement in 
three editions and departed the office feeling that 
this would surely bring us something. Three days 
later we received a letter, whch read, 

X Y Z, Herald. 

Gentlemen : 

Noticed your advertisement in the Herald this morn- 
ing and would be glad to see you at my rooms this even- 
ing between hours of 6 and 8. 

Very truly yours, 

K. M. Foe. 

In reading this our hearts beat with joy, for we 
anticipated great things. McDuff planned keeping 
his position for six months, so that he could learn 
to speak the French language. I readily decided to 
do the same, while Saunders expressed his desire of 



working only long enough to get money to pay his 
hotel bill and secure a ticket to London. 

At the time appointed we called at the gentleman's 
rooms, which were in the Standard Hotel, and he 
proved to us a notable disappointment. He pro- 
posed to teach us a game by which we could easily 
break the bank at Monte Carlo and thereby win our 
fortunes He said, of course we would have to 
begin with about a thousand francs. This gentleman 
as he termed himself, proved such a disappointment 
to us that we decided to have some amusement so 
we praised his scheme highly and advised him that 
we would certainly return the following evening 

Several days later we left for London, and you 
may be sure we did not keep our appointment with 
the would be prince of schemers. 

Paris is pre-eminently the city of pleasures. In 
the gay summer season one can see hundreds of tour- 
ists strolling along the beautiful boulevards At 
nights the principal ways are brilliantly lighted, and 
m passing by one sees scores of people in the fas- 
cinating cafes enjoying the refreshing night air 
and the merry music as they sit and sip. 

The Champs Elysees at night is one great high- 
way of pleasure. On either side are theatres and 
drinking gardens, and from every direction one hears 
the gay music of the orchestras. 

One day while walking through one of the many 
beautifully kept parks we met a party of five youn^ 
American students. They had ridden on bicycles 
from London to Paris and had stopped for a' rest 
of several days, after which they intended making 
their way into Germany. These fellows were all 



members of the same class at Harvard and were 
touring Europe on their bicycles. 

At our hotel we only secured breakfast and din- 
ner. Lunch usually consisted of cheap French wine 
and a loaf of bread on one of the penny seats in the 

We kept up our bluff remarkably well at the hotel, 
and, honestly, the landlady never even suspected that 
we were stranded. If she had known it, most prob- 
ably she would have demanded pay in advance, but 
we talked so cleverly of how we enjoyed the theatre, 
how delightful the drive was, and such things that 
she never had a suspicion of our financial predica- 

One morning I came near getting myself into 
trouble for drenching a vegetable peddler with wa- 
ter. It seemed to me that he had been standing in 
the streets below for an hour, crying out his vege- 
tables. I wanted to go to sleep but couldn't with all 
that racket going on below, so I filled the bowl with 
soapy water and dashed it all over him. When the 
water drenched him he yelled like an Apache Indian, 
and before long a policeman came up to investigate 
the source of such an act. Of course we were mno- 
cent ! having just awakened from a sound slumber. 

One of the most pleasant surprises of my stay in 
Paris was while waiting at the mail window of 
Thomas Cook and Son for the long expected coin, 
^when whom should I see but my old comrade Good- 
fUu^^, 'man, vainly endeavoring to gain some information 
from a chesty policeman. Goodman did not see me 
and I had some real pleasure in watching him at- 
tempting to converse in French, when the only 



French he could muster to his service was, "Oui, 
■Monsieur," and "Parlez vous Frangais?" Stepping 
up to him I laid my hand on his shoulder and said, 
"Pardon me, sir, but are you an American?" 

Never have I seen one's face so radiant with joy 
and happiness. We soon got together and began to 
arrange and plan for our future maintenance and sup- 
port, Goodman being in about the same condition, 
financially as the rest of us. 

One who has never been in a large foreign city, 
far from friends and home, cannot comprehend the 
absolute feebleness, helplessness and lonesomeness, 
which we four fellows experienced for days. 

The last night of the miserable days which we spent 
in Paris came very near terminating disastrously for 
Goodman and myself. It was a night at one of the 
largest dance halls in the Latin Quarter, the most 
dangerous portion of all Paris. Goodman and I 
paid our admission fee, one franc each, and. imme- 
diately began looking around, hoping that we might 
find some one who would be so charitable as to pre- 
sent us to some of the charming dancers. 

For a while it seemed that our sole enjoyment 
would come from looking on, but presently, much to 
our pleasurable surprise, I saw a young Frenchman 
whom we had met a few days previous while visiting 
at the University of Paris. This young fellow with 
his delightful manner proved quite a help, introduc- 
ing us to several captivating belles, who, to our sur- 
prise could two-step and waltz exquisitely. Here 
we enjoyed ourselves till the early morning hours 
and when we were ready to depart, much to our 



chagrin and disappointment, we found that we were 
totally lost, traffic having long since ceased. 

Our first thought was to find a policeman, but we 
found that officers were rare in that particular quar- 
ter, which added to the horror of the situation. In 
the hazy distance we caught the glimmer of lights 
which we instinctively followed, only to find, too 
late, that they led in the very opposite direction from 
which we desired to go. 

I then suggested to Goodman that we had better 
look for a four-wheeler, but he stubbornly insisted 
that we continue on foot, and in less than five min- 
utes we found ourselves beset by thieves and mur- 
derers of that treacherous quarter. 

At first we pretended not to understand what this 
sudden and unexpected demonstration meant, but we 
were not long in learning that it meant injury, rob- 
bery, outrage, and probably murder. Immediately 
Goodman delivered one of his right hand swings 
straight for the jaw of the foremost thug, and he 
fell as if stricken by an electric shock. In the mean- 
time both of my arms were pinioned behind me by 
two husky ruffians. Goodman attempted to rescue 
me, and received a blow on the arm which deprived 
him temporarily of its use. The ruffians were dis- 
mayed at Goodman's force of arm and physique and 
turned their attenton toward me. I called out, "Run. 
Max, run." Goodman was loath to leave me, but he 
soon took to his heels when two men of his size ad- 
vanced towards him. 

They dragged me into a dark alley nearby and 
there they cursed and swore on finding that I was 
penniless, with the exception of about two measley 


^ _ 






finDclman Delivered one 
Swiii.q-s Strai.uht for llic 

of His 


Wrnu'rilusi ) 


francs. The ruffians seemed fearfully disappointed 
in that they found such a small mite upon my per- 
son, for most foreigners have the erroneous im- 
pression that all Americans are millionaires. Fool- 
ish idea. They seemed to think that Max would re- 
turn with help, and, after administering several hard 
kicks and knocks over my head and on my body, I 
was left to the mercies of Providence, bleeding, 
dazed and semi-conscious. I staggered to my feet 
and attempted to find the way to rhy hotel and my 
friends. Never again do I expect to feel as I did 
that morning as I sneaked into the hotel, after hav- 
ing spent such a miserable and perilous night wan- 
dering forlornly through the still and desolate ave- 
nues of the Latin Quarter. 

Realizing that something must be done, we man- 
aged to secure enough money to pay our board bill 
and purchase tickets to London. That night we bade 
farewell to Paris, and started for London, where we 
arrived at an early hour, without a blooming sou in 
in our pockets. We finally found a boarding place 
and spent the morning in sleeping. In the after- 
noon we set out and pawned what little jewelry we 
had with us, with which I secured food. 

Goodman and I had been thinking of going to 
Odessa, on the Black Sea, and now that we were 
desperate we decided to make the trip, if there was 
any possible way. 

After we had been in London some days, we went 
down on the Thames where the big ships were 
docked, and finding one ready to set out for Odessa, 
we stole aboard and stowed away in the bottom of 
the ship, where no one was likely to discover us 



When well at sea, we intended coming out and of- 
fering to do w^hatever we were ordered. Even hard 
work on a ship was better than starving in London, 
for sailors are usually given potatoes three times a 
day, while a penniless man in London knows not 
whence comes the next meal. 

In the bottom of the dark, dirty, foul-smelling ship 
we lay for hours, thinking every moment that she 
would start, but to our disappointment it was another 
half day before she set out on her voyage. All this 
time we had been without a single mouthful of food 
or a drop of water. We became desperate and 
crawled out of our hiding place to the deck, where 
we were soon spied and despite our pleading and 
begging, we were ordered ashore. 

The ship was now slowly wending its way down 
the Thames, with the pilot skilfully guiding it 
through the deep channels. On either side were the 
banks dotted with the little huts of fishermen and 
sailors. We were so feeble from our fast and from 
lying in that cramped position for hours that neither 
of us could barely move, and when we were told we 
would have to swim ashore I almost fainted. I 
had never had much practice in swimming and to 
undertake such a task at this time seemed suicidal, 
for I knew that I was too weak to hold out. 

The sailors crowded about us, and our delay 
seemed to excite the anger of the officer who was 
ordering us around. He shouted that if we didn't 
make haste he would have us lowered over the side 
of the ship by ropes. Realizing that the only thing 
to do was to swim, we climbed down the rope lad- 
der on the starboard side. Max went first and when 



at the end of the ladder he leaped into the 
river and began swimming toward the shore. I 
yelled at him to wait for me, but he kept on, seem- 
ingly frightened out of his wits. Now that it was 
up to me I climbed slowly down to the bottom of 
the ladder, and there 1 clung hesitating. What 
would it be, suicide or murder? I felt that if I 
should attempt to swim I would surely drown. 
Yet if I did not the sailors threatened to throw me 

While clinging to the end of the ladder it was 
jerked violently out of my hold, and, losing my bal- 
ance, I plunged backw^ard into the river. As I fell 
I heard the wild, hideous shouts of the sailors above 
who were leaning over the deck rail. 

It is a well know^n fact that one can be drawn un- 
der a ship by the suction and cut to pieces by the 
propeller. Naturally, this thought flashed into my 
mind as I sank into the water. It seemed to me 
that my time had come, but I was not one to give 
up all hope. When I came up again to the water^s 
surface I beat desperately and frantically to keep 
from going under the second time. Fighting for 
safety, I began swimmliig tow^ard the bank, some 
hundred yards away. Before I had gone ten yards, 
I realized my wet clothes were hindering my prog- 
ress. I fought with the current more desperately 
than ever, for the sounds of "Help! Help!" were 
ringing in my ears. 

I reached the bank safely, but so worn out that I 
could scarcely drag my limp body to dry land. Look- 
ing over my shoulder, I saw poor old Max lying on 
the opposite bank, and when I waved my drenched 



handkerchief to him, he saluted by a wave of the 


Fortunately the sun was shining, and on the grassy 
banks of the Thames we sprawled in the warm 
rays while our drenched garments were being dried. 
When our clothes had been sufficiently dried we pro- 
ceeded up the banks opposite each other, and it was 
not long before we were gripping hands. 

The following day while strolling along the Strand 
we met a couple of friends. Bob Morris and Nelson, 
both of Georgetown University. These fellows had 
just arrived in London and from them we secured 
a small loan, which was, at least enough to feed us 
for several days to come. A few days later our 
troubles ended, for Goodman received a letter con- 
taining a considerable sum and on the first outgoing 
steamer he sailed for New York. 

Two days later I was steaming homeward on a 
cattle boat. The return trip lasted ten days and the 
monotony of it soon palled upon me. 



The following fall at the University was a trying 
one for it was darned hard to get back to the studies 
after such a bully good time tramping over Europe. 
There wasn't much midnight oil wasted, for I w^as 
too full of foot-ball. Ten good men were trying for 
my place on the team, and consequently it took all 
of my time to hold down left-half on the Varsity 

Well, I won, and we had some dandy times on the 
trips that season. Warner, Cornell's old coach, 
trained us that fall and he had a fine lot of material 
to pick from. After we had played the Thanksgiv- 
ing game, with the University of Virginia, I returned 
home, and remaining there only a few days, departed 
for Washington, D. C, where I secured a position 
with the Washington Times. 

While at the Naval Academy on a football trip, 
the year before, I met a young chap by the name of 
Anderson. He came to Washington in January 
shortly after being expelled from the Academy for 
hazing and proposed to me that we two hit it for the 
West together. This idea struck me in the right 
place and at the right time, for I had been contem- 
plating another chase over some part of the world. 
He was from the Naval Academy and I from the 
University of North Carolina, but then and there we 
joined forces to matriculate in that larger, but less 



select college — the University of Experience. I, of 
course, had had more training in that school than 
Anderson, but I knew that he'd be game to the last. 
Of all my experiences, I dare say that not the least 
adventurous I ever butted into was when in com- 
pany with Will Anderson, I boarded the train at 
Washington and began our journey toward the set- 
ting sun. 

We purchased tickets to St. Louis by way of Chi- 
cago at a cut rate price, and landed in the Windy 
City on a Monday morning. A gloomy looking day 
it was, too, our joint possessions amounting to thirty 
cents. After receiving a rebate on our railroad tick- 
ets, which amounted to two dollars and fifty cents, 
we entered a certain restaurant where the waiters 
neither wear dress suits, nor expect exorbitant per- 
quisites. Each having replenished the inner man 
with Clarke street dainties, we began our search for 
something to do, but finding congenial employment 
proved a much harder task than when we used to 
tell how to do it back in Washington. We com- 
menced by hitting for such positions as newspaper 
reporters, office assistants, and the like ; we ended by 
accepting positions? — no, just ordinary jobs, I as a 
laborer in a lead mill just off Halstead street, while 
Will answered to ''Front/' doing the bell hopping act 
at a north side family hotel. For my work T re- 
ceived one dollar and seventy-five cents a day, and, 
truly, it was the darnest hardest money I ever earned 
in all my life. It simply meant lifting big lead bars 
weighing anywhere from one hundred to tw^o hun- 
dred pounds all the day long, that is, from six o'clock 
in the morning till five in the afternoon with half 



an hour at noon for lunch. My room and board cost 
me five dollars a week so at the end of the first six 
days I had a few dollars in my pocket. 

I boarded at a restaurant on Halstead street, and 
the proprietor of this notorious establishment was 
formerly a cab driver in Paris. Evenings, after I had 
finished my work, we two would have long talks 
about the city of pleasures, for both of us knew the 
place pretty well, he having lived there the greater 
part of his life, and I having been there several 
times. Gee ! but this was a tough joint. During my 
stay there I was afraid of being killed for there were 
murders taking place around there very frequently, 
as the scareheads of that date will testify. I could 
hardly have expected anything better on Halstead 
street, for those who are acquainted with that 
particular section of Chicago will tell you that 
there's scarcely a place on the toughest part of the 
Bowery that can compare with certain sections of 
that famous Chicago street. 

Anderson acted his part of an old experienced bell 
hop at the Virginia Hotel on the north side of the 
city. For this he received seven dollars per week 
and meals. At night he came to my room on Hal- 
stead street and we bunked together. He was usu- 
ally on duty at night till about ten o'clock, and after 
finishing his work it would take him about one hour 
to ride over the city to where we were rooming. It 
mattered not how tired I was, I would always sit 
up and await his coming, for it was awfully lonely 
there by myself. Not wishing to make these exalted 
positions a life business, in a couple of weeks we 
"resigned our commissions,'^ donned our happy 



habiliments and wended our way to a certain mail 
order establishment, and after much wagging of 
tongues, finally found ourselves correspondents at 
$15.00 per. But we didn't care to confine ourselves 
to stereotyped forms, and much preferred to let our 
pens wander, and to be original, so, not knowing 
when we were well off, quit that. 

Then we thought we would like the peaceful, care- 
free life of the farm, so hired to a j\Ir. Heren of 
Crystal Lake, 111., as experienced farm hands. This 
Mr. Heren had offices in the Monadnock Building, 
and we were sent to him by the manager of the Em- 
ployment Agency. When this particular individual, 
who wanted a couple of good farm hands out on his 
place, learned that I was handy with tools and that 
Anderson could milk a cow to a finish, he was more 
than pleased. He furnished us tickets to Crystal 
Lake which was forty miles from Chicago, and there 
we landed the next day. 

As we alighted from the train at that future me- 
tropolis, Will chewing a straw in typical reuben 
fashion, and I furbishing my talk with many "by 
goshes" and "gol derns," I was sure I could discern 
a superior knowing smile on the face of thg foreman 
in the wagon nearby, when, after the explanations, 
he told us to ''hop in." 

Could I plow? Yes, I could plow. Could Ander- 
son milk? Yes, he could milk. Well, I shall never 
forget the numerous "beefs" he made while posing 
as an "experienced farm hand." How^ he strapped 
the halter on the horse's back and led him out to 
water; how he wasn't satisfied with having the 
horses drag only the harrow after them, but had to 



take several rods of picket fence with him when 
driving them through the gate ; how, when there were 
only two ways of doing a thing he would invariably 
do it the wrong way — in fact, while I made a better 
showing that he, the only thing that either of us 
did like ''experienced farm hands" was to consume 
large quantities of food at meal times. Well do I re- 
member how we used to sit opposite one another at 
the table and giggle, and tee-hee like a couple of 
school girls, and how, after controlling our risibles 
for a while, we fairly exploded when Heren, Jr., 
told us we looked like a couple of fellows who had 
run away from school. 

Anderson's efforts at milking ! Goodness, but they 
were fierce ! I shall never forget his attempts at the 
first cow he "milked." He went after that bovine 
with vengeance, and did his utmost to coax, bribe, 
threaten or cajole her into giving up her milk, by 
getting half Nelsons and hammerlocks around the 
necessary part of her anatomy, but like the rest of 
her sex, she was stubborn when she wished to be, 
and absolutely refused. So when Norman, the fore- 
man of the farm, returned to the scene of action, 
she was complacently chewing her cud, and Ander- 
son, like the hero in the story books, was making a 
last "almost superhuman effort" to make her come 
across — and the pail was empty. I guess Norman 
thought he might be able to get milk from a con- 
densed can, but when it comes to cows, "Nay, nay, 

About my plowing! Those furrows looked about 
as straight as a writhing sea-serpent with a bad 
stomach ache, with no wintergreen handy, and to 



Norman's practiced eye they must have looked twice 
that bad. Oh ! but I was ''handy with tools," — even 
if I didn't know a hammer from a pickaxe ! 

Those long-suffering people stood for all that, but 
our services were no longer required when Anderson 
buckled the belly band around the horse's tail, fed 
him straw and bedded him with hay. Nevertheless 
at the same time Heren, Jr., treated us royally under 
the circumstances, and if laughing really makes a 
man fat, he surely ought to have been a heavyweight 
by the time we left. And strangely enough when we 
'fessed up, he didn't seem astounded in the least. 
Sometimes I even doubt whether he ever thought 
we were experienced farmers. 

Then that handy man job in "Chi" with me for 
the man, who couldn't drive a nail without bending 
it, or hitting his fingers, and, consequently saying 

A week on the farm was enough, for Norman de- 
cided that he couldn't use us to a good advantage, so 
back to the city we went. 

y As soon as we arrived in Chicago we struck out 
for an Employment Agency and were not long in 
securing a place out on the North side. How we 
used to make the dust fly out of those Brussels car- 
pets and Oriental rugs, and make the lawn mowers 
sing over the smooth lawns of that richly inhabited 
settlement. We worked for a man who had a con- 
tract with about twenty people of the settlement to 
keep their carpets beaten and their lawns mown, and 
to do odd jobs around the houses. 

We rented a room only a few blocks from where 
our work lay, and three times per diem we did the 



gastronomic stunt. Oh, what a whole bunch of 
things we did do, such as flirting over the back 
fences with the maids in typical "handy man" fash- 

When I think of the time when we painted the in- 
terior of the house for one Mr. Farnsworth, our em- 
ployer, I certainly smile out loud. We painted every- 
thing except the paper on the wall, and we would 
have done that had there been any to paint. And 
when Mr. Farnsworth, assuming the role of an art 
critic, said, ''That's a very poor job, boys," Ander- 
son replied, "Well, you can't expect a Raphael for 
twelve dollars a week." This, like our other jobs, 
did not last long, for two hours afterward Farns- 
worth learned of the fight I had had with Mrs. Wil- 
liams' cook, an Irish lady of some two hundred 
pounds, and he promptly fired us. 

When he turned us off we each had about five 
dollars coming to us so we lit out for our old haunts 
over on Halstead street, where we knew that board 
would be cheap at five "per." By this time we were 
both getting pretty tired of the city proper and 
wanted to get out on the big ranch lands of the 
Northwest, where we could work and probably save 
a little money. I finally hatched up a scheme by 
which we were able to make enough of the "elusive" 
to pay our way into the wild and wooly West. It 
was on a Saturday night that we put into practice 
this well grounded scheme of mine. 

Away back in my knickerbocker days I had had 

some experience as a patent medicine peddler, so it 

^ ^ dawned on me that we would be able to make a few 

dollars by selling patent medicines. Saturday after- 



noon I rented from my friend Ikey a long black coat, 
a tall silk hat, a big imitation diamond, and a few 
other little necessary articles to give me the appear- 
ance of a typical patent medicine doctor. At the 
Drug Store around the corner from where we lived 
I purchased a dime's worth of new stoppers, a piece 
of red sealing wax, a couple of bottles of vanilla, 
and one small bottle of myrrh. These articles safely 
stored in my room, I put Anderson to work making 
the wyonderful preparation, while I went out to pur- 
chase a basketful of bottles from the second hand 
bottle dealer. Returning to the room with the bot- 
tles, about one hundred in all, I found that Will had 
the mixtures prepared and then we set ourselves to 
Avork filling the- bottles. After all the bottles had 
been filled we placed a new stopper in each one, 
then sealed it artistically with the highly colored wax. 

Saturday night is a joyful one for the laboring 
people of that section of Chicago, so by eight o'clock 
we had our drygoods box placed on the corner of 
Halstead and Van Buren streets, I think, where 
there are hundreds of people passing all the time. 
A big torch was burning, and there I stood on top of 
the box all decked out in my "rentals," making the 
greatest speech of my life to the people who crowd- 
ed around. I ended bv savingf, "Now, ladies and 
gentlemen, is the time, for there are only a few bot- 
tles of this wonderful compound left." 

Anderson, who was standing in the middle of the 
crowd, elbowed his way to the front, planked fifty 
cents down on the box and at the same time remark- 
ing, "Give me a bottle of that; it is the only kind 
that ever done me any good." It is wonderful how 


"A big Torch was Burning, and there I Stood on Top 
of the Box all Decked out in mv Rentals." 

( Wnnrlrrlvfil ) 


the sophisticated inhabitants of large cities can be 
fooled. This started them, and it wasn't long before 
our supply was exhausted. I returned the clothes to 
my friend Ikey, and the next day we were on our 
way to the real West, our tickets reading Yankton, 
South Dakota. 

The morning we arrived in Yankton it was rain- 
ing, so instead of going out to look for a job, we hung 
around one of the general mercantile establish- 
ments all the forenoon. We had only about twenty 
cents between us and we spent it for sardines and 
soda crackers. That afternoon we were successful 
in landing a job out on Brown's ra^ph, a distance of 
fifty miles from Yankton. 

We leared that Brown had been wanting a couple 
of men for some time, and he had notified the man- 
ager of the store to the efifect that if any stray ones 
came around his place of business to advise him and 
he would send in after them. The storekeeper put 
the proposition up to us and we accepted on the spot. 
We had to spend the night in Yankton, and he ad- 
vanced us money with which to pay our lodging. 
The next morning, by break of day, we were on our 
way to the great ranch lands and those two little 
western horses attached to that light wagon were 
only about six hours in conveying us to "Brown's 
X," as it was generally known throughout the coun- 
try of South Dakota. 

Six long lonely months were enough on that ranch. 
There was only one incident of any impor- 
tance during our stay at Brown's place in the heart 
of the range country of Dakota. A part of a letter 
received from my good friend Anderson not many 



months ago will acquaint the reader with this little 
episode of mine. In recalling some of our past ex- 
periences, he writes: *'Say, but didn't we make the 
eatables do the disappearing act, though, when we 
would come in after inhaling great draughts of 
Dakota ozone? And those cow-punchers were all 
good fellows — that is, all except Baker. I am at a 
loss to understand why he had it in for you, unless 
it was your unconscious 'hit' with that Parker girl, 
and I think he had designs on her himself. I believe 
that when he dared you to ride that 'bronco' without 
saddle, bridle, or stirrups, or anything else except 
a girth, that he hoped you would either be killed or 
permanently injured, for he seemed disappomted 
when you came out unscratched. Straddling the 
bare back of an 'outlaw' with a mean disposition is 
a darn tough proposition, especially as you have 
nothing to hold on to except the mane. I'll never 
forget the day Baker told the Bunch that after he 
had finished dinner he was going to show that 'col- 
lege kid' a few things about the manly art, and 
when you came to, you would probably know some- 

"When you came in the bunk house I had a hunch 
that there was going to be something doing of a dis- 
agreeable nature, and I was a trifle uneasy, as Baker 
was really an excellent specimen of physical man- 
hood — but then so was Reynolds an excellent speci- 
men of physical manhood, and, incidentally, the lat- 
ter knew a few things about that 'manly art.' 

"Truly, I gloated inwardly when, after he 'cussed 
you out/ and you proceeded to give him a little 


"Straddlino the Bare Rack of an Dutlaw 

a Touj^rh 

( lianilrrlust) 


practical demonstration of 'fist against face and face 
against floor,' and repeated the same until he had 
had enough. 

" 'He was going to hit you.' Yes, the horrid, mean, 
cruel, brutal man. He hit your fist so hard with his 
jaw that the sheer force of it knocked him down. 
But he at least was man enough to apologize, and I 
noticed a marked change in him from that day on, a 
change in both countenance and manner." 

Six months in the bad lands of Dakota had tanned 
me till I could hardly be told from an Indian. It did 
not affect Anderson so much for he was naturally 
dark skinned and the change was not so perceptible. 
I put on about twenty pounds while he added over 
ten. Six full months there had broadened, thick- 
ened and toughened us. 

On our way back East we stopped over in St. 
Paul for several days, and there we blew in the little 
sums which represented six hard months' work at 
thirty dollars per. As the old fellow would say, 
"we did it brown," and had we not purchased 
through tickets to Chicago from Yankton, we never 
would have landed there seven days after leaving 
the ranch lands. 

At any rate we landed in Chicago safe and sound, 
and not a sou between the two of us. On leaving St. 
Paul we had forty-two cents; forty cents we spent 
on the train for oranges, bananas and a couple of 
magazines, while the two cents was spent for a post- 
age stamp. This stamp was used in mailing Ander- 
son's letter, which he had written about a month be- 
fore while we were doing the cowboy stunt. 

When we alighted from the train we were truly 



two wild looking men, for neither of us had suffi- 
cient or proper clothing. We had intended purchas- 
ing some garments in St. Paul during our stay there, 
but by the time we were ready to make our purchases 
we found that we were minus the cash capital re- 
quired. Both of us wore sombreros, overalls and 
flannel shirts. Back in the Windy City and broke 
again ! But this thought did not haunt us for we had 
grown accustomed to being in that condition, no 
longer embarrassing. 

We proceeded to an Employment Agency, where 
we had a few months previously secured positions, 
and again we made application for jobs. "Just any- 
thing," for we were down and out and needed the 
money. We told the manager that we had had some 
experience as housemen and such a job would suit 
us well enough. He informed us that he had a call 
for a couple of men out on East End Avenue in the 
Hyde Park section, and that we might go out there 
and make application for the places. 

We didn't have a darn cent to deposit with him 
for securing the places for us, so he decided to wait 
for his money till we had drawn our first week's 
wages. He said we looked pretty honest and that 
he would trust us for the four dollars. He further 
added that we looked more like bronco busters or 
prize fighters than we did like housemen. He 'phoned 
to the house on East End Avenue where they wanted 
the men and told them that we were coming out. 
From this particular Employment Agency to the 
house where we were to go it was a distance of eight 
miles so we had to hoof it out there, for neither of us 
had carfare. 


"That N'ight we Slept on the Benches in Lincoln {*ark. 


Well, in short, we arrived there about dusk and 
were successful in securing the places as housemen 
for this millionaire. We were to begin work next 
morning, so we hit toward a restaurant where we 
got supper for carrying in about a ton of coal from 
the street to the third story of a cheap tenement 
house. That night we slept on the benches in Lin- 
coln Park and at six the next morning were at our 

The work pleased us all ri^ht, for it was light and 
simply meant beating carpets, scrubbing floors, 
washing windows, mowing the lawns, polishing the 
brass on the doors, in fact merely carrying out the 
duties of an every day houseman. 

We were working for the Coleridges. The old 
gentleman was a wealthy glass manufacturer, and 
for our services at this particular residence we re- 
ceived ten dollars per, meals included. Oh, we used 
to have sorhe lively times. 

One day, while busily engaged in the reception 
hall, scrubbing the marble stairway, I cast my peep- 
ers on the card tray, and, my curiosity being aroused, 
I "copped" a couple of invitations the postman had 
brought that morning. There were five in all, so 
I thought that two would be enough for Anderson 
and myself. When I went down in the basement to 
get some more clean rags from the laundry girl. An- 
derson was there engaged in sweeping. I gave him 
the wink and a nod, and when he came out we went 
back to the furnace room and examined the invita- 
tions to a dance which was to be given by Mrs. 
Ostrand at her residence on Cornell Avenue. We 
then and there decided to accept. 



The time for this affair soon came around and we 
held our nerve for we were determined to do the Sol- 
dier of Fortune act once in our lives. The afternoon 
before the dance we stopped work about four o'clock 
and went to our room where there was some tall 
scrubbing, and much time spent on our rusty hides. 
This preliminary part of the toilet completed, we 
took a car downtown and there I made arrangements 
to rent a pair of pumps, silk hat, white kid gloves, 
full dress suit, top coat and the other necessary ap- 
parel. While I was getting fitted up in this estab- 
Hshment, Anderson busied himself in purchasing a 
few toilet articles. 

We set out, I in my rented clothes, and he in his 
full dress uniform, which he had no right to wear. 
On turning the corner we hailed a cab and had the 
driver head toward Mr. Ostrand's. We drove swift- 
ly up the drivev/ay, alighted, and presented our cards 
of admission. Ten minutes later found us in the 
reception hall looking casually about, smiling and 
talking pleasantly to one another. I remarked that it 
was very strange that our friends were not there to 
receive us after our having received such a cordial 
invitation. Anderson ventured, ''Well, indeed, it is 
embarrassing for us that our friends have neglected 
us so shamefully." 

We saw that we were not making any progress 
standing there so we entered the big ball room, which 
was one lovely sight. The floral decorations were 
beautiful and the music rendered by the orchestra 
was perfect. The ball room was filled with beauti- 
ful women, who wore handsome gowns and precious 
jewels. We rubbed shoulders with the best of them 



and my chance was not long in coming. We were 
rather to the side of the big foldmg doors 
leading to the reception hall. A couple of young 
ladies nearby were apparently engaged m some 
interesting topic of conversation. They had only 
been there a few moments when a young fel- 
low walked up to them and addressing the brunette, 
said "Why, how do you do. Miss Miles, how are 
you'^" She greeted him cordially and he began to 
inquire about her people back in Iowa; ho^y long 
she was going to be in Chicago, and a number of 
other questions. I overheard the whole conversation 
so I whispered to Anderson, ''Well, old man this 
is my chance, lie low and watch your Uncle Dudley. 

I left his side and an instant later I was standing 
face to face with the young lady whose name was 
IMiles. Approaching her, I extended my hand in a 
most familiar manner, and at the same time said, 
^'Whv INIiss jMiles, how are you, how are your folks 
in Iowa? What a delightful time we had at the 

last dance." . 

She looked at me in a doubtful sort of way and 

replied, 'T'm sorry, but I don't believe I remember 

^^''Condon," I volunteered, and then she smiled 
sweetly and said, ''Oh, yes, certainly I remember 
you, Mr. Condon, how stupid of me to have forgot- 
ten " 

I pretended I had met her out in Iowa at a dance 
and she never knew the difference or even suspect- 
ed me in the least. She introduced me to the blonde 
with whom she had been conversing and shortly af- 
terward I motioned Anderson over to where we were 



standing and presented him as my young friend 
who had recently graduated from the U. S. Naval 
Academy and was spending only a few days in Chi- 
cago awaiting his assignment to a ship. 

Well, we met these two girls and they in turn in- 
troduced us to others, and before we departed we 
had sipped and chatted and danced with many. We 
avoided the hostess of the evening very cleverly, and 
as luck would have it none of our new acquain- 
tances were so rude as to inquire who invited us. 

There was one little incident of the evening which 
was the biggest piece of nerve I have ever seen dis- 
played on any occasion. It was after the fifth dance 
that we spied the two Coleridge girls sitting over be- 
neath some palms in the rear of the ball room. An- 
derson walked over to where they Vv^ere, and intro- 
ducing himself, he struck up a conversation with 
these fair ones of our own household. They cer- 
tainly did stare at that young cadet and when he 
signaled me over, and in a most diplomatic manner, 
''May I present Mr. Condon?" the girls appeared as 
though they knew not what to say. 

Two days later Mrs. Coleridge overheard a con- 
versation between her daughter Aileen and Ander- 
son. He was lovemaking, and she said, '*0, Will, I 
knew all the time that you would fulfill my dream." 

During the three weeks we had been there this 
devil Anderson had been making eyes at "Aliss Ai- 
leen," as the servants spoke of her, and it ended as 
most stories do; they saw, he loved, and she con- 
quered. On hearing this astounding conversation, 
Mrs. Coleridge promptly dismissed us from service. 

Out of a job again ! Well, what did we care ? We 


had been in that identical fix a score of times before. 

Two weeks later found us in Ohio as representa- 
tives for a publishing company, that sounds so much 
better than "just book agents," where came the "do- 
ing" of Fostoria, Tiffin, and last but not least, Fre- 

I can still remember those samples of front door 
eloquence, which we used to reel off to all the moth- 
ers. I shall never forget one instance in particular 
when I was telling a mother these books were worth 
their bulk in diamonds, their weight in gold, or some 
words to that effect, when I happened to look across 
at Anderson and beheld his countenance, usually sto- 
ical on such occasions, distorted in a good-natured 
grin. I exploded in laughter, tried unsuccessfully to 
apologize, then, not wishing to make myself any 
more ridiculous than I could help, bolted for the 
screen door, slammed it after me, and left one Wil- 
liam B. Anderson of Brooklyn, to make the best of 
the situation, while I lowered the record for a hun- 
dred yard dash down the street. But the best part 
of it was that he was more than equal to the occa- 
sion, and sold her a set of books. 

We were representatives of the Students' Refer- 
ence W^ork, an encyclopedia in a nut shell, so to 
speak, condensed for the use of school children. Dur- 
ing ten days as representatives of this publishing 
house we found two purchasers. 

We would stroll up to a house, rap, and on 
being confronted by the lady of the house 
we would promptly ask her if she had chil- 
dren in the public schools. As soon as we asked 
about her children, she would become interested, 



thinking we were school authorities, and then invite 
us inside. Once seated in the house we would ap- 
proach the subject of the child's advancement by 
degrees, and then when the time came I would bring 
to view a prospectus of the book, which I carried 
concealed under my coat. We had to practice deceit 
to gain admittance to the houses, for if ever any of 
them saw a book agent approachng they would let 
you stand there till doom's day without answering 
the bell. 

Next came Toledo, Ohio, where we thought we'd 
try a Thespian career, so we shanghaied into that un- 
known aggregation of "hamfatters." Looking ahead 
we could see ourselves in the limelight, actors, 
"stars," if you please, at a salary of $i,ooo the week, 
and all that sort of thing; the rude awakening came 
later. The cynical manager, rejoicing in the name 
of Hoppstein, still owes yours truly a certain little 
sum for services rendered in a thinking part, not- 
withstanding the fact that I have jogged his memory 
several times with a few please remits. 

It was in Toledo that we separated, Anderson beat- 
ing it towards the West, while I struck out for home. 
Before leaving Toledo, Anderson served a week as 
"barker" for a refreshment stand and side-show of 
the "Feast and Furies" company. I was in Toledo 
for his first day's performance, and as I looked at 
that noisy, brazen barker, I hazily remembered that 
a few months before I had seen this same individual 
in Cadet navy blue, jauntily marching on dress pa- 

We had been together nine months, sharing each 
others joys and sorrows. Each found a good com- 
. 82 


' ,u. nfVier and it was hard to separate. 

KV" e or epaTtfng, we signed a pledge to 
However, oeiu f ^^^ ^^s ^o 

rirxt: wol^ Lt m .. po. 0^. of 

Palo Alto, California, on January 5*, between 
fhe hours of twelve and one. If it so happened that 

ed in the month of August; 



The four months during which I was separated 
from my dear old pal soon passed. My time at home 
that fall was taken up in literary and athletic circles. 

Christmas came and the day was drawing near 
for my departure to the Pacific Coast where I was 
pledged to meet my friend. 

I left on the day following Christmas and arrived 
in San Francisco January 4th, the day before the 
cherished reunion. En route I spent pleasant short 
stops in St. Louis, Kansas City, the Grand Canyon 
of Arizona, and the petrified forest. 

The morning of January 4th, I crawled out of 
my bed in a Frisco hotel feeling that within a few 
hours there was to be a happy reunion. On inquiry 
I learned that Palo Alto was only an hour's ride 
from 'Frisco, a distance of forty-four miles. The 
train was scheduled to depart at eleven o'clock so 
a short while before eleven I boarded the car in 
front of my hotel for the Townsend Street Sta- 
tion. As ill luck would have it, I arrived at the Sta- 
tion just five minutes after the train for Palo Alto 
had departed. I learned that the next train would 
not leave till three o'clock, so I promptly despatched 
a message, which read: 

Mr. William Anderson, 
Palo Alto, California : 
Missed train; meet you same place four o'clock. 




I waited around the station till three o'clock that 
afternoon. We arrived in Palo Alto on time, four 
o'clock. When the train had come to a standstill, I 
hastily left the car and proceeded by direction to the 
Post Office. Palo Alto is but a small University 
town of some three thousand nihabitants, and as a 
consequence, I had little trouble in locating the 
said office. 

As I entered the door my heart sank within me, 
for Anderson was not there. This disappointment 
quite upset me and I hardly knew just what to do. 
I walked over to the General Delivery window and 
inquired for my mail. Not a line ! 

I then hurried to the telegraph office and asked if 
a message had been received there about four hours 
previous from San Francisco addressed to one Wil- 
liam Anderson, and whether or not the message had 
been called for by the person to whom it had been 
addressed. The operator replied in the negative, so 
then I inquired whether or not there was a message 
there for Jack Rand. No, was the reply again. I 
truly had never felt so badh^ in my life, for after 
looking forward to this meeting for so long a time, I 
had to be disappointed. I really did not know what 
to do, for I had ridden all the way across the conti- 
nent to meet my old friend, and he had apparently 
gone back on me. I thought at least he would have 
kept his pledge and written me of his delay, but, 
alas ! not even that. 

Anderson and I had planned to take a course in 
law at Leland Stanford University which is located 
half a mile from Palo Alto, but after this bitter dis- 
appointment, I did not care to stav, and especially 


aftef I learned from the registrar of the University 
that I could only take up two courses in law at that 
particular time of the semester. 

I remained in Palo Alto some days, thinking per- 
haps that by some miracle he might turn up later. 
But no such good fortune. 

Later I returned to 'Frisco where I spent a month 
in trying to obtain suitable employment. I did not 
have an over supply of cash capital, and consequent- 
ly, after a few fastidious parties, I found my cash 
on hand sheet getting very short. 

One morning I sat down on the side of my bed to 
count my little over, and found that I was the pos- 
sessor of five one dollar bills and a five dollar note. 
Gee ! but this looked pretty bad for me, and I began 
to wonder what I was going to do when the money 
ran out. After finishing my breakfast that morning 
I glanced over the *Help Wanted" columns and my 
eye stopped on ''Sailors wanted. Ships sailing for 
Australia, India, China and the Orient. Apply Hum- 
boldt House." I felt that I would not experience 
any trouble in securing a place on any one of the 
steamers as I had with me an able-bodied seaman's 
certificate, w^hich I had earned plying up and down 
the South African coast. 

In the afternoon I strolled down to the Humboldt 
House, situated in the heart of the sailor quarter, 
and on making application to the booking clerk of 
the office, I was not long in signing up for a voyage 
to Sidney, Australia, and back by way of Hong 
Kong, China. The thought of a trip through the 
East pleased me highly, so I walked down to where 
the "Britisher" was docked and went aboard. I 



spent half an hour on her and when leaving told thtf 
"bowswain" that I would be back the next morning 
with my outfit. 

The "Britisher" sailed the following afternoon, but 
it sailed without one Jack Rand, for I actually would 
not have made the trip on that old shell had they 
made me captain of her. Every hand on the boat was 
a Chinaman with the exception of the Captain, First 
Officer, Engineer and the ''Bowswain." Those ugly 
looking Chinamen with their long pigtails hanging 
down their bony backs, and keen edged knives stuck 
securely in their belts did not look any too good to 

The night I remember as well as if it was only 
yesterday. I left my hotel shortly after supper and 
headed toward Golden Gate Avenue. It was a damp 
night and I wanted to mingle with the people, hear 
the music of the dance halls, and maybe trip the fan- 
tastic myself, for I was homesick and lonely. My 
little pocket account was still decreasing, and I 
really did not feel the toughness of the position I 
was playing till that evening when I found my 
earthly belongings in the coin line amounted to four 
dollars and fifty-five cents. 

Three thousand miles away from home with a bad 
cold, four dollars and fifty-five cents, hotel bill due, 
not a single friend or acquaintance to turn for as- 
sistance. I strolled down Golden Gate Avenue with 
hands dug deep in my pockets, coat collar turned up 
and hat pulled down over my eyes, for it had just 
begun to drizzle rain and the breeze from the sea 
was biting and penetrating. As T strolled along I saw 
on almost every side big life-size placards, and pic- 



tures of Jimmie Boyles, the Amateur Champion of 
the Pacific Coast, who was booked to fight that night 
at the Dreamland Skating Rink. 

Well, as I had gone through with almost all my 
money in the past week, I thought I might as well 
spend the balance, so I planked down a dollar and 
gained a general admission to the Dreamland where 
the fi-ghts were to be pulled off that night. There 
were six round contests on the programme and the 
big fight between Jimmie Boyles and whoever wished 
to try him out would be the last one fought. 

In 'Frisco at that time they only allowed them to 
go six rounds, and that night there were some hot 
six rounders in the Dreamland. It was the first 
time I had ever witnessed any of the fights in the 
West, and I enjoyed seeing them pound each other, 
emphasis on the "pound each other." AVhen the first 
six fights had been completed the ring manager stood 
on the platform and announced through a big mega- 
phone that any one who would come up and fight 
Jimmie Boyles, the amateur champion of the Pacific 
coast, and stay in the ring with him the six rounds, 
that a purse of one hundred dollars would be award- 
ed. Jimmie stood proudly leaning against the ropes, 
at the same time bowing to his admirers, as the yeller 
made the announcement from all sides of the plat- 

Several volunteered, but were ruled out on account 
of being classed as professionals. For a while it 
looked as though they were not going to be able to 
get Jimmie a fighting companion. As I stood there, 
I thought, "Well, I am a darn long way from home 
and this chance looks good to me, although Fm not 

W A N n E R L U S T 

much of a bruiser/' Suddenly I raised my hand 
above my head and yelled to the man on the plat- 
form that I would fight his Jimmie Boyles. Those 
standing close to me turned and looked, while the 
eyes of the whole audience fell my way. I pushed 
through the excited mob of spectators and ascended 
to the platform, where I introduced myself, *7ack 
Condon from Richmond, Va." I was not long in es- 
tablishing my amateurship, and after being intro- 
duced to the huge assemblage, I repaired to the 
dressing room. 

I was then weighing one hundred and seventy 
pounds stripped, and when I walked out on that plat- 
form in regular fighting costume I felt like a turkey 
nearing the axe. I appeared wrapped in a brown 
blanket and took my seat in one corner, while Jimmie 
sat opposite me. A trainer sat on either side, one 
rubbing my arms with alcohol, while the other was 
saying, "Now, kid, don't git skeered, but hit the devil 
hard. YouVe goin' to win, for I feel it in the dust. 
Ah, git out, what are all these pretty muscles for if 
you can't lick that Jimmie over there with only one 
hundred and thirty-five to hit yer with ?'' 

The gong rang. I threw aside my robe and walked 
to the center of the ring. I was so scared I could 
hardly breathe; there was a great big lump in my 
throat and my knees were a bit shaky. Those knees 
of mine did not get very weak till I got right up to 
that Jimmie and saw his face. He had freckles, and 
I have always been afraid of a freckled face man. 
They say they are mean and will fight like the devil ; 
now I know thev are mean and also know that they 
will fight like hell. 



We shook hands, and as I prepared to take my 
position and make a grand stand show, he piled me 
one right square in the right eye. This stunned me 
for a moment and I could see only stars. When I 
regained self-control I was the maddest I have ever 
been in all my life. I gritted my teeth and went at 
that one hundred and thirty-five pounder as a buzz 
saw goes after a knotty log. He was apparently 
knotty and I intended to cut some of them out. The 
gong sounded — end of the first round. By this time 
my eye had swollen so badly I couldn't see from it 
at all. Five more rounds! 

During the second bout I hit that fellow a few 
good ones and I knocked him down more than once 
with those big long railers, as they term them back 
in North Carolina. Along about the fourth round I 
saw that he was going to get the better of me and 
put me out of commission if I didn't protect myself. 
Then I decided to keep away from him as much as 
possible, and in the sixth round he was chasing me 
around the ring like one rooster does another in the 
pit. Whenever he cornered me I would clinch with 
him, and as a consequence the official would neces- 
sarily consume some time in breaking us. I cared 
not iiow long it took to separate us, for my game 
was a time killing one. I only wanted to last the 
six rounds so I would be able to get my purse, for 
such was my only salvation. 

The very last of the sixth round he forced me to 
the ropes, and just as the gong rang he drove me a 
straight from the right shoulder which landed 
squarely on my eye. This blow sent me over the 
ropes of the platform and I fell to the floor, twelve 



feet below. I remember distinctly that terrific 
punch, but I do not remember having hit the floor. 
The next morning I was barely able to see, for 
both eyes were swollen dreadfully and my poor 
head was paining terribly. Two swollen eyes and 
a big knot on the head was enough. On awakening 
my first question was, "Did I win?" 

"You sure did," replied one of the fellows in the 
training quarters, for it was there I had spent the 
night. I secured my hundred, and two days later I 
was on a Southern Pacific sleeper bound for my 
home back in dear old North Carolina. 

For several weeks after my return I waited and 
wondered what had become of Anderson. He had 
failed to turn up at the appointed place, at the ap- 
pointed time, and he had even neglected to write me. 
I had just about given him up for dead when one day 
I received a letter from him informing me why he 
had not shown up on January 5th in Palo Alto, and 
also explaining why he had not written or weired me 
as agreed. It thoroughly vindicated him. There 
seemed to be some "hoodoo" about his existence for 
having unusual things happen to him, and as a con- 
sequence he was always doing the unexpected. 

His letter read: 

Pueblo, Colo. 
My Dear Jack : 

As I commence this letter, old man, I feel very much 
like a prisoner with an^ excellent^ case of circumstantial 
evidence against him, striving to vindicate himself, and at 
the same time knowing the task to be an extremely diffi- 
cult one. 

Now, you have doubtless wondered why I didn't live 
up to the mutual agreement, didn't let you know imme- 


tW A N D E R L U S T 

diately of anything which turned up to prevent me from 
doing so, and, strangest of all, why I haven't written you 
long before this. 

Now, Jack, i am going to try to explain, although it is 
a mighty hard thing to do on paper, but before I begin, I 
want to remind you that while you and I have peddled 
a goodly portion of the warm oxygen together, that I 
have always been "on the square" with you, as I trust you 
have with me : so don't think that I've taken this from 
one of last century's novels, for every word of it is gos- 
pel truth, so help me God! 

I will begin with the minor things leading up to the 
climax and grand finale, so that you can more fully com- 
prehend it. You see, old man, I went back to Dakota with 
the purpose of earning money and saving it. I surely 
earned it with the sweat of my brow, as the "Good Book" 
says, but it was the old, old story. It slipped through my 
fingers. Well, I went from Arlington to Huron. Work 
then was beginning to get rather scarce, but I went to a 
boarding place, and by a straightforward story secured 
board in advance. Then, for a time, I managed to get 
just about enough work to liquidate my weekly board bills. 
Finally the thing petered out about altogether, but I was 
given credit for a week. During that week of hanging 
around I waxed loquacious, and revealed a little of my 
past history. That made it good for another week. Then 
I told them that I expected money from home, which I 
did. I then wrote for twenty-five dollars, which I received 
in company with a lengthy sermon, and paid fifteen dollars 
out for board, leaving me with a miserable little ten dollar 

Now, in the good old halycon days at the Academy we 
used to convert our language phonographs into roulette 
wheels, and in recreation hours — and not infrequently in 
study hours — gamble for requisitions. We agreed that all 
the fellows who should be "ousted" from the Academy 
should be paid cash, if winner, as the "reqs" would be use- 
less to them. 

Our room was raided by upper class men one day, and 
the thing found out, but as the midshipman in charge was 
certain of "bilging" himself, he didn't report us, but simply 
gave us unofficial hell instead. Well, when the game was 
broken up, a certain Rogers of Cincinnati, Ohio, was in 
debt to yours truly to the extent of twenty-five dollars. I 
made a hurried departure from AnnapoHs, and furthermore 



I didn't care to mention such a then trifling thing to 
Rogers, as 1 had between five and six hundred dollars. 

Well, you know how we arranged it — went to Pitts- 
burg, then to Chicago, and due principally to your good 
management, we never got to the stage where 1 had to 
ask for it. Every letter Hardin wrote me how he really 
believed Rogers meant to pay, and all that sort of thing. 
To make a long story brief, Rogers never was man enough 
to ofifer to close the little "debt of honor," and I was too 
proud to ask him. When leaving Huron, though, I wrote 
him a letter asking him to send it, in part or in full, to 
Omaha. Nebraska ; I depended on his honor and started 
out. Went to Sioux City. Iowa, on a cattle pass and left 
most of my capital there. When I took an acount of my 
coin, found that I possessed less than three dollars, and 
the fare to Omaha was three dollars and fifteen cents. 
I went to the Bureau of Information, and found that I 
could go to Blair, Neb., for amount on hand. Accordingly, 
I paid passage to Blair, trusting to luck to catch a freight 
train out of Blair, and I figured that even if this failed I 
could walk it, the distance being only twenty-four miles. 

Arriving at Blair, broke, I slept in the depot over-night 
— Christmas Eve — think of it ! Woke up Christmas Day 
■without a cent, and feeling like the wrath of God. Oh, 
yes, it was a merry, merry Christmas. Finding that no 
freight trains were running on account of holiday. I solilo- 
quized, "Well, William B. Anderson, ex-midshipman. 
United States Navy, it's up to you to make the best of 
your way via 'the hoof to Omaha, so get thee busy at 

I knew, or thought I knew, I would find a money order 
for twenty-five dollars there. Arrived in Omaha about 
dusk, footsore and weary, and went at once to the P. O., 
only to find to my intense anger and chagrin that it was 
"Closed on Account of Holiday." 

I marched on the double quick to a Western Union Tele- 
graph office, and scribbled a lengthy telegram for funds. 
I was told that it would have to be "O. K.'d" by the man- 
ager before it could be sent Collect — so I waited three 
hours or thereabouts before that personage finally materi- 
alized. The long wait didn't tend to calm my general feel- 
ings of irascibility. I handed the form to him, and after 
half scrutinizing it, he told me that he couldn't pass on 
it and have the risk of its not making good at the other 
end, but if I would cut out about three-fourths of it, he 



would. Now, I knew that every single little word was 
absolutely necessary, and tried to reason with him, but 
to no end. Then all the bad, irascible, ruffled feelings that 
had accumulated within me for the last couple of days 
surged forth, and I read the riot act to him as it had 
never been read before. I never thought I was capable 
of such a supply of inventive. It did no good, of course, 
and ended in my being shown the door by the uniformed 

I went to the Postal Telegraph with almost the identical 
result, so broke, but not in spirit, I walked the streets 
till morning, and then sat in a saloon till business opened 
up and I could get my bearings. I went to the Post Office 
as soon as it opened, asked for my mail, but received 
a brief "Nothing.''^ I went to an employment agency and 
asked for a job in a restaurant, having had nothing to 
appease my hunger for more than a day. Told him I'd 
make good when I got paid. He wouldn't do business on 
those grounds, but said he had received a 'phone call for 
a man to beat carpets just for the day, and that if I 
wanted that, he wouldn't charge me anything. I wanted 
it all right. I reasoned, "Well, within two weeks I'll be 
attending college, but Jack and I did it once when we 
were up against it, so it's good enough for me now and 
nobody need ever know.'* 

I went to the address handed me, a private family of 
the middle class, and applied. A good looking young 
woman brought me a line and a couple of carpet beaters, 
and I smiled as I thought of the time you and I used to 
utilize them. At noon she showed me where to wash, 
invited me to lunch, and really treated me elegantly. She 
asked me my name, and a whole lot more, and then told 
me that she and her mother rather liked my looks, and 
wished I'd stay and sleep in the vacant house to which 
they intended moving, and help the men transfer the dif- 
ferent articles from one house to another. I had intended 
staying the one day only, thus getting sufficient to send 
home for outfit and fare to Palo Alto, but she didn't un- 
derstand my case, of course. She thought she was doing 
me a favor, and as she "looked awfully good to me," I 
stayed, and that's really the beginning of the story proper, 
the former part being merely prelude. 

At night the young woman's husband came home. He's 
head broker for one of the largest packing houses, and 
she told him about it. He was a little insignificant runt 



with a glass eye, and the tip of his olfactory organ betok- 
ened more than a speaking acquaintance with beverages of 
an alcoholic nature. He was pleasant ^^ first but he 
by no means approved of his ^^fe's interest in me^ ^he 
orobably regarded me as a mere child, but I liked to thmk 
Stherw se. He stayed at home the next day "to help move 
of course. He made several significant remarks, such as, 
"Your hands don't look like those of a ^fboring man 
"You say you're from Richmond, Va., but you hav en t 
much Southern accent." "It's funny, one yrith your control 
of languages, and apparent education should be beating 
carpets^' I knew he wasn't saying this to peddle iny good 
qualities to his pretty little spouse, the shrimp so I at 
once suspected that he possessed a streak for amateur 

^'welriTelped him move, and he watched me as a cat 
does a mouse! but I didn't blame him, as he had several 
articles of value among his stuff. We had most ot the 
a? c es moved by night! but as things were strewn around 
fn topsyturvy fashion in the new house, he concluded to 
remain in the old apartments that night. 

He sent me after two keys, for the front and back doors 
of the new house, and said he would pay me and dismiss 
me when I returned. I went to the locksmith's and got 
Se Two keys, but-well, you know how careless and ab- 
sent mended I am, and when I returned I'll be damned 
HI could find but ine of them-I had lost the other. Then 
he as much as told me that I had bidden the key or given 
ft to Tn accomplice, so that I could go over and unlock 
the door of the new house and help myself, and that it 
strengthened his convictions all along that I /idn t work 
for a living.. That sure made me hot under the collar, and 
got eloquent and told him that his theories were prepos- 
terous in the extreme, and that I was well aware of the 
fact that I was no Hercules, but if it were not for the 
kind treatment of his wife, I'd thrash him right fere^ 
I got warm and excited and reached in my pocket for 
my handkerchief to wipe away the perspiration. That lit- 
tle fool must have misunderstood my purpose, ^or then 
old man honest Injun, cross my heart, he ran over to 
^he dresser took a loaded revolver from the drawer, and 
fired The' bullet went through the glass back of me with 
a racket capable of waking the dead. His wife /ainted, 
I ru'hed h?m, and hit him a left hook that would have 
broken any punching machine manufactured. 



This sounds rather boastful, considering my slight 
build, but I was in a heat, and it meant a whole lot to 
me how hard I hit him. That cowardly whelp then let 
out a blood curdling yell, and went down, and I realized 
what a fix I was in. The shot and yell must have attracted 
the attention of passing pedestrians, for they all gathered 
in front of the house. Not wishing my name to be given 
so much publicity in an affair of that calibre, I took the 
bunch of letters in my inside pocket, went over to the 
range and threw them in, just as a cop appeared on the 
scene. Seeing the state of things, the cop hit me over 
the head with his nightstick, and after viewing at close 
range planets, heavenly satellites and other decorations of 
the lirmanent, I must have collapsed ; when I revived, I 
had on a pair of handcuffs, and the little measly runt was 
concluding his one-sided story. 

Well, then, for the first time in my life, but not the 
last, as you will see later, I was arrested. Went up before 
the judge next A.M., and, to condense my story, the 
kernel of the judge's remarks to me was that I looked 
young and unlike a criminal, but as I had burned my let- 
ters, thereby admitting carrying a fictitious name, and was 
also in a strange town with no visible means of support, 
he would have to convict me of vagrancy, and concluded 
his remarks by saying that he hoped it would teach me 
a lesson. Thirty days ! My God ! don't attempt to imagine 
my feelings. 

Well, there's a whole lot more I could tell you, but that's 
the principal part, and improbable as it all sounds, that's 
the true story of the successive links of evidence which 
resolved themselves into the complete chain of circum- 
stantial evidence which kept me away from Palo Alto. 
I had a crumpled postal in my pocket, and penciled on it 
"Don't condem me, Jack, until you hear my story." and 
begged a negro to mail to you for me. I addressed it to you 
at Palo Alto, California, but I doubt if you ever received 
it, as when I got out a couple of weeks later, your letter 
awaited me at the Post Office, forwarded from Huron, 
and you didn't say anything about having received the 
postal card. 

W^ell, the judge visited me during my confinement, and 
drew out of me my real name and address, but none of 
my past history or future plans, and he at once surmised 
that I was some kid who had rambled from home and 
mother, so he wrote my father a lengthy letter^ the tenor 



of which was that a boy claiming to be his son was con- 
fined in that city on a charge of vagrancy, and that while 
the boy was bright and inteUigent, he was most assured y 
on the wrong path of life. He believed that a kmdly 
interest by my parents, manifested at this time, would 
work wonders in transforming me into a future good arid 
useful citizen. He further added that his advice would 
be to send either my railroad ticket home, or sufficient 
capital to start me out on some new project, as he really 
believed the young man meant well.. Pending an answer 
to his letter he would keep me apart from the toughs and 
general habitues of the bull pen. , ., . , , . 

Now he read this note to me, and while it appealed to 
my sense of humor, I couldn't imagine what would happen 
if he sent it, so I fairly begged him not to do so, telling 
him that my folks thought I was doing well, and I ^prom- 
ised more things than I can think of, so he didn t mail 
the letter, but instead let me out a couple of weeks after 

my arrest. , ,• i j. j 

When I received your letter I was much disheartened 
to see the Asheville post mark, as it told me that you 
had taken the trip across the continent for nothing at all— 
and also, old man, while your letter was more polite and 
courteous than could be expected under such circumstances 
I could see between the lines all that you left unsaid and 
what you thought of me. and that the letter was lacking 
in the old time enthusiasm, but God, old man, I couldn t 
help it, and can never express in words the sorrow 1 feel 
in having disappointed you. , , , ^ , u t,- ^ t 

When I left the Academy, and left Reordan behind, 1 
thought that I could never again find a friend who under- 
stood me so well, or who was understood so well by me 
but a few weeks later I was pleasantly surprised, and 1 
know up to last January you possessed a kindred feeling 
and had faith in me. Probably you may have some idea 
of the way I feel at having deadened the feeling of one 
whom I considered my warmest friend, yourself, when 
you recollect that the chief thing I have done or tried 
to do thus far in life is making friends, and keeping their 
good regards. Had I enjoyed less, I'd be at Annapolis 

Every acquaintance of mine from Chicago to Pueblo, by 
way of Huron, has heard of you through me, but I can t 
say enough by letter to make me feel right, so 1 11 knock 
off but if you'll answer at once telhng me that it is all 


er* f 


right, and mean it, you'll make me feel a whole lot better. 
I am fully aware of the trouble, expense and annoyance 
I caused you. God knows any one would have had their 
faith shaken, and most people would have sent me a letter 
that would have fairly scorched the paper. To think that 
after looking forward to the time for months, with the 
greatest of pleasure, that something unforseen should turn 
up that couldn't have disappointed you more had I plotted 
the whole thing out in advance ! And, take it from me, 
that I was never more disappointed. But this talk doesn't 
relieve my feelings. 

Well, I sent home for fifty dollars, which came in due 
time, as I didn't wire, but wrote explaining full particulars, 
but, needless to say, I didn't tell them of the arrest, as 
I'd never had the nerve to face them again if I had. With 
this money I purchased a ticket to Denver, Colorado, and 
from Denver here. I am working as assistant timekeeper 
in the Open Hearth Division of the Colorado Fuel and 
Iron Works, but I got my foot slightly burned, and intend 
to quit and go to El Paso, and from there to Mexico. 
Almost had my ticket bought when I made the acquaint- 
ance of a man named Straight, who has a son at the 
Academy, and he is one of the grand high Moguls in this 
town, with boundless influence, both political and other- 
wise. He has promised me something good, so I've 
changed my mind, but I may change it again before long 
and travel. 

Well, old man, I have been dreading and deferring it, 
but now the explanation is over with, thank God, and I 
await with anxiety the verdict. 

Goodby, old man, tell me all about yourself and your 
plans when you write, and let that be soon, then I'll answer 
at once. 

With best regards, I remain, 

Your old pard, 

William B. Anderson. 

Needless to say, I forthwith informed Anderson 
it was "all right," and our careers since then have 
proved that our mutual disappointment was for the